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Preparing Your Student
Recommended Readings for
Parents
Parent
& Guest Orientation
Congratulations
on your son or daughter’s acceptance to the University of
Michigan! You should be very proud that he or she has been admitted
to one of the top universities in the country, and we hope he or
she will choose to attend Michigan in the fall!
At Michigan, we recognize that the next year will be one of tremendous
transition, not only for your son or daughter, but also for you
and your family. To help you both through this transition, we have
some advice for families as they prepare to send their sons and
daughters off to Ann Arbor next fall.
Preparing
Your Student
College life brings a whole new set of responsibilities. Balancing
increased academic workloads, a new social life, a new job, exercise,
leisure activities, and religious/spiritual values presents students
with a great deal of stress and anxiety. In addition, students add
new responsibilities for managing life outside the classroom in
ways that previously had been handled by their parents. Taking on
personal and financial responsibility may be completely new to some.
Others may have had experience in these areas, but may be intimidated
by the thought of so much responsibility without the parental safety
net.
You can help your student prepare for these new responsibilities
by discussing expectations ahead of time and by allowing your student
to practice before he or she arrives on campus. The more comfortable
your student feels about managing his or her own business affairs,
the less stressful these new responsibilities will seem in the fall.
The following are some of the experiences that many students feel
are big adjustments when the come to campus:
Doing
own laundry
Laundry facilities
are available in most residence halls. You can help to prepare your
student by making sure he or she knows how to operate machines,
understand clothing labels and symbols, and separate laundry as
needed. Practicing before leaving home is a big help. It may seem
like a minor detail, but with all of the transitions in the fall,
all the minor details can really add up.
Sharing a room
Most freshmen
live in residence hall rooms with at least one other person. For
many, this will be the first time they have ever shared a room.
You can help to prepare your student by teaching him or her to respect
a roommate’s personal space, property, and unique differences.
You can teach your student how to openly communicate in personal
relationships, how to set ground-rules with a roommate, and how
to utilize University resources and Residence Hall staff when necessary.
Scheduling own health appointments/managing prescriptions
University students may use the University Health Service. Most,
but not all, services at UHS are free to enrolled students. Your
son or daughter will need to take responsibility for his or her
own health. You can help by requiring your student to make health
appointments for himself or herself, by teaching your student his
or her health history, by providing him or her all of the necessary
health insurance information prior to arrival on campus, and by
instilling in your student a sense of personal responsibility for
health-related issues. In the fall, you can also send your student
to campus with a first-aid kid and some basic health supplies.
Navigating public transportation
Riding the bus is a fact of life at Michigan. University and city
buses are free for U-M students, and students who are comfortable
riding the bus will find them to be a great asset as they navigate
campus. You can help your student ahead of time by teaching your
student how to read bus schedules, how to arrange for air/bus/train
transportation, how to arrange for shuttle service to the airport,
etc. You can also encourage your student to utilize the local resources,
such as the Campus Information Centers, the Ann Arbor Transportation
Authority (AATA) website, and the University Transportation website,
that can help with these transportation issues.
Working with University staff
You can help by requiring your student to communicate directly with
University departments and to take responsibility for his or her
University ‘career’. Students should feel comfortable
with University resources and seeking assistance from University
staff. Students should learn which department to call when problems
arise. They’ll learn more about resources and departments
at Orientation. You can help by resisting the urge to ‘come
to the rescue’ by contacting the University departments yourself.
Instead, encourage your student to contact the University departments
directly. By encouraging your student to take responsibility for
himself or herself, you will demonstrate that you have confidence
in your student, and you will empower your student to be self-reliant
and independent.
Living within a Budget
For many students, college is the first time that they have had
to take responsibility for their own financial affairs. Parents
can help with this adjustment by discussing expectations and setting
ground-rules ahead of time. Parents should also educate students
about how to establish a budget. You can help by establishing a
weekly or monthly budget with your student. Teach your student how
to plan for regular expenses (monthly bills, personal supplies,
groceries), as well as unexpected/infrequent expenses (new clothes,
health care expenses, replacing broken/outdated property, etc..).
Make sure they know how to balance a checking/debit account before
they come to campus.
Using Credit Cards
University students have easy access to credit cards. In fact according
to a nationwide study in 2000, 83% of undergraduate students owned
credit cards, and 47% of them had four or more. In addition, 21%
had credit card debt balances between $3,000 and $7,000. As a parent,
you can help your student to learn about responsible credit card
usage before he or she comes to campus. Be sure to discuss your
expectations ahead of time. Will your student be allowed to open
credit card accounts? Will he or she be allowed to use a debit only
system? Teach your student how to accurately compare credit card
offers, how to read the “fine print,” and how to act
responsibly when it comes to debt management. Educate your student
on the dangers of credit cards and how to avoid their pitfalls.
Information about credit card education is available on the Federal
Reserve website at www.federalreserve.gov/pubs/consumerhdbk. Public
Interest Research Groups also provide credit card information at
www.truthaboutcredit.org.
Paying Bills
Your student will be responsible for paying the University bills,
regardless of who is writing the check. The University does not
mail paper account statements. Instead, they are available to view
online. Students are automatically given access to view their student
account statements. However, parents are not. Parents can view the
account statements only if the student as authorized the parent
to do so. In addition to University bills, there may be bills from
credit card companies, or other bills that your student will need
to pay. You can help by teaching your student how to accurately
read billing statements, how to keep organized so that bills are
not paid late, and how to resolve problems if bills are inaccurate.
Making choices about alcohol and other drugs
For many students, the toughest choices they will have to make take
place outside of the classroom. Choosing unsafe behavior on a college
campus can have life-long consequences. You can help your student
to make responsible choices by communicating your expectations about
alcohol and other drugs ahead of time and discussing family values
regarding alcohol and drug use. You can also educate your student
about campus resources (which you’ll learn about at Parent
and Guest Orientation), and you can teach your student that it’s
OK to say no.
Staying safe
Generally, Ann Arbor is a safe place, but as in any city of over
110,000 people, crime does happen. You can educate your student
about safety on campus by teaching him or her ways to keep property
safe (such as locking doors and locking bikes), and by teaching
your student that personal and property safety are individual responsibilities.
You and your student will also learn about University safety resources
at Orientation. Additional campus safety tips are available in the
Campus Safety Handbook, available online at www.umich.edu/~safety/reports.html.
Recommended Readings for Parents of College
Students
Throughout the different stages of raising a child, there have been
books to help you along the way. From the “What to Expect” books to books on coping with the teenage years, there are experts
out there who want to help you.
Here are a few books to help you as you begin your journey into
this next transition – the transition to college.
- Almost Grown: Launching Your Child from
High School to College, Patricia Pasick
- Don't Tell Me What To Do, Just Send Money: The Essential Parenting
Guide to the College Years, Helen Johnson
- Letting Go: A Parent’s Guide to Understanding the College
Years, Karen Levin Coburn & Madge Lawrence Teeger
- The Launching Years: Strategies for Parenting from Senior Year
to College Life, Laura Kastner & Jennifer Wyatt
- You're On Your Own, But I’m Here if You Need Me: Mentoring
Your Child During the College Years, Marjorie Savage
- When Your Kid Goes to College: A Parent's Survival Guide, Carol
Barkin
Parent
& Guest Orientation
The
Office
of New Student Programs (ONSP) coordinates
Parent
& Guest Orientation each summer. ONSP
also provides helpful advice
for parents of incoming students. Parent & Guest Orientation is an optional, but highly recommended program. Students are required to attend the Student Orientation program.
Parent and Student Expectations for Orientation and Beyond
As a family member, you are vitally important to your student’s success at Michigan. You will continue to serve as an important source of information, guidance, and advice for your student throughout the college years. We expect that your student is prepared to handle their new responsibilities as a college student beginning in orientation. We want you to be aware of the expectations that we will be communicating to each new student at orientation, and ask for your support in reinforcing these expectations. For example:
- We expect students to make their own reservations for orientation (and to make the Parent & Guest reservations as well). Students are responsible for creating their University of Michigan computing account and password prior to registering for orientation, and to keep this information safe and secure. They should not share this information with anyone.
- We expect students to attend all orientation activities. All sessions during orientation are required and programming is specifically designed to assist students with their academic and social transition to the University. Students may be dismissed from the program without registering for classes if they have missed activities and are unprepared to register for classes.
- We expect students to act as responsible adults, without the imposition of a high school-like curfew. Since students do not have a curfew in the residence halls in the fall, they are not given one during orientation. Required orientation sessions extend into the evening on both nights of the program. Additional activities designed to acquaint new students with campus and Ann Arbor are also planned by our staff. Please encourage your adult student to participate in these activities – it is a great way for them to meet new friends.
- We expect students to register for classes with the assistance of the professional academic advisors only, and not their parents or family members. It is our goal for students to build a relationship with their advisors as well as learn the necessary skills to register on their own in future terms.
- We expect students to follow all orientation rules, including rules prohibiting alcohol and drug use. Failure to comply with these rules can result in dismissal from orientation without registering for classes, or legal consequences including arrests, Minor in Possession tickets and fines, and future appearances in local courts. It is important for parents and family members to maintain open lines of communication with their adult students. Information about a student’s misconduct, academic performance, and other student records are confidential, and the University will not normally share this information with parents and family members without the student’s written consent. While it is not unusual for students to seek assistance from family members, family members may not act on behalf of or represent students in internal administrative proceedings.
We recognize the importance of communication between family members, and you still have a considerable amount of influence with your student. By talking with, and listening to your student, you can offer information, support, and guidance. Before attending orientation, talk with your student about what it means to take on these adult responsibilities, your expectations for his or her behavior at orientation and in the fall, and your expectations for how your student will keep you informed about his or her University experience. By discussing these expectations, you can help ensure that you and your student are on the same page, and that your student fully understands the expectations of the University community.
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