Men: Who Needs 'Em?
We finally found one woman we suspected was a lesbian, who told us her story. We met in the garden of her familys estate, in modern-day Essex, then called Terling, April 8, 1760. Anne Camden is a thirty year old woman still living with her elderly parents. There was no recognition of lesbianism as a social construct in the 18th century, or even an official word (it became an adjective in 1820, a noun in 1925) (39). Rebel does not intend to superimpose 21st century constructs of lesbianism upon Anne, we are simply trying to understand her romantic involvement with women in the historic context of her century.
|
R: Do you think they are involved romantically,
or even sexually?
AC: Well, everyone assumes because they
did not want men, they do not want sex (44).
But the good girl of my century, as in the conventional woman, is
not supposed to want sex at all. Do you understand me? Im not supposed
feel an ounce of lust, let alone act upon it. Let alone with another woman.
If you were to ask any man if they really thought the Ladies of Llonglen were
sexual (in reality, not in their lewd fantasies) they would surely reply what
folly, what nonsense, of course they did not desire each other, womans
natural desire is for man. Some women even prescribe to this nonsense
that women feel no sexual desires. I overheard the famous authoress, Frances
Burney, at a ball once arguing with a certain Miss W. Miss W. declared it
is an amorous disposition; that I do not possess
men are happier than us,
it is because they are more sensual! (45). And
by the way, Frances replied, I would not think so! (46).
So, to answer your question, I would assume the Ladies of Llonglen were romantically
involved. I agree with Burney that of course, woman have sensual desires, and
for women at that! For it was at this same ball, I met Sarah Ponsonby and she
suggested as we were getting our wraps and going into the night, that we engage
in tribady. (she smiled smugly)
R: Tribady? Im not familiar with that
term
AC: Ah, a woman is called a tribade
if she is romantically involved with another woman, even without sexual involvement.
The word tribade between women is referred to, even if it is not
sexual (47).
R: Now back to Lady Mable, may I be frank are you romantically involved with her? Do you sleep together? Do you engage in tribady?
|
R: Tell me more about your maidservants. We understand maidservants often slept in the same beds in small servants' quarters and that they partake in giving each other pleasure, dont your parents abhor that behavior?
AC: They dont know it goes on. I know,
well, because I also have an intimate relationship with my chambermaid, Emily.
What we woman do in private is of no concern to men, except in their lewd fantasies.
And what the maidservants do in their private bed chambers is of no interest
to their masters, as long as they dont get pregnant.
|
R: Do you oftentimes fear that you will be punished for your involvement with Lady Mable?
AC: No, of course not. Just like I was explaining
that masters dont bother themselves with servant affairs, this man-run
society doesnt care what we women do in our own time. The only time men
take notice is when woman/woman intimacy interferes with woman/man relationships.
For example, Lady Mables husband came back early from London and caught
Lady Mable and her maid naked in the bath. But all he did was send the maid
away the next morning. He believed the maid had seduced Lady Mable, in a sense,
taken his place. But his dear Lady could not have desired the maid, he was certain,
so he simply sent the vulgar, oversexed maid away! Little did he
know Lady Mable had forced Emily to bathe with her! Some maids have not been
so lucky, as was the case with Susannah Yeareley who was raped because Yeareley
was too kind to her mistress (48). Aye, Providence
was on the side of Lady Mables servant! But, intimate encounters between
women thrive in acceptable all-woman places my maid tells me: nunneries, servants
quarters, and houses of correction (49).
R: No offense, for a century bordering on the
rather staunchy Victorian Age, uh nevermind, Im talking about the future-Miss
Anne, you really never feared punishment for sexual interactions with women?
AC: No that is absurd, the mild punishments
that are given dont even refer to our sexual interactions, let me tell
you a story. Now, the only time I ever feared punishment was when I first met
Lady Mable. I was about 20, and we had not yet involved ourselves in tribady.
We were simply best friends and we shared our loathing of marriage. Lady Mable
read in the papers of women dressing as men. In fact, The Fleet Registers gave
three examples of women marrying each other (50). I
was considering dressing as a man and marrying Lady Mable
this has been
sensationalized of course by Fieldings The Female Husband. But, really,
we had talked of it until Lord Hardwicke Marriage Act of 1754 made it
harder to do (51).
R: So you didnt
fear punishment before the Marriage Act? What about men marrying men, did they
try to dress as women?
AC: Oh, you mean men of the Molly Club, sodomites,
effeminate men? They have been severely punished. Hanged, imprisoned, put in
the pillory, the rack. I have even heard of a crowd beating a man to death,
or cutting off his ears (52). The charge is sodomy
and it is a sexual charge, even if the men are romantic without physical intimacy.
Luckily, for me, romantic love between women is not even publicly recognized
as a crime! Even after the Marriage Act women marrying women was only a charge
of fraud, not sexual deviance (53).
R: So you dont fear punishment from society,
but tell me, do you feel ostracized for what publicly appears to be an intimate
relationship with another woman, instead of a man?
AC: Yes, actually I do. When we go into Terling,
we as in Lady Mable and I, I see woman whispering to one another and men
well,
men seem to salivate when they look at us wide-eyed. I hope someday, we can
be public about our love