resolutions: An eNewsletter from FASAP, Work/Life Resource Center and Mediation Services

February 22 , 2007

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FASAP Educational Series:
“Managing Anger” & "Banishing Burnout – Re-Engaging with Your Job"


Managing Anger

The Faculty and Staff Assistance Program will be offering an eight-week, one hour per week education programs on Managing Anger, starting March 7th from 11:30 am to 12:30 pm.
The class will focus on:

  1. How to understand the anger response and recognize anger triggers
  2. Learning steps and skills for cool downs and other ways to manage one’s anger effectively
  3. Learning problem solving skills
  4. How to brainstorm appropriate responses to stressful situations

 

This series will be conducted by two counseling staff of FASAP.  The sessions will be held in a confidential setting within the FASAP office area, in the Administrative Services Building.

Those who would like to learn how to better understand and more effectively manage their anger are encouraged to attend.  Participation is voluntary. 

To register for this educational series, or if you have any questions, please contact FASAP’s program assistant Tina Weymouth at 936-8660.

Class size is limited, so those interested are encouraged to register promptly. 
Please register by March 2nd.

 

Banishing Burnout – Re-Engaging with Your Job

Dates: Tuesdays, March 13th - April 24th
Location: FASAP Office, 2076 Administrative Services Building, 1009 Greene Road
Time: noon-1:15 p.m.  

The Faculty and Staff Assistance Program (FASAP) is offering a seven-week educational and support group for faculty and staff who may be experiencing burnout in their jobs.  This interactive group will explore causes and dynamics of job burnout, including both personal and organizational aspects.  Participants will identify their own signs of job burnout and develop coping strategies to reduce and prevent its personal impact.  Additionally, members will be encouraged to practice and discuss these methods of coping.  Participants’ level of burnout will be assessed both at the onset and conclusion of the group.  Sessions are at no charge to faculty and staff. Participation and information shared in the group will be strictly confidential.

Class size is limited so those interested are encouraged to register promptly.  Please register by March 6th. 

To register, please contact FASAP’s program assistant Tina Weymouth at 936-8660.

 

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From Stress to Serenity, Quickly
Tom Waldecker, Director, Faculty and Staff Assistance Program

There are often times when we feel a bit overwhelmed and just can’t wait to relax by will power alone. Most of us have a wide range of commitments, from work, family, profession and our own personal chosen ones that seem to be weighting us down.  We may have our sights set to take a vacation and that would be a great stress reliever, but most of us can only find the time or resources to do this once in awhile.

When issues or events of the day begin to feel overwhelming to you, try one or more of these quick but effective relaxation techniques.

  • Controlled Breathing – Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose to a count of six, allowing air to fill your lungs up.  Hold your breath for a count of four. Then exhale slowly and completely while counting to six again. Repeat this at least six or more times.
  • Mental Imagery – Close your eyes and place yourself in the most peaceful, relaxing place you can imagine.  Use guided imagery music if possible which can help you relax as you mentally create the sights, sounds and sensations of your personal oasis.
  • Progressive Muscle Relaxation – Starting with your face and working your way down to your feet tense each muscle group for at least the count of five slowly and then hold and relax for 30 seconds. Repeat this at least once before moving on to the next area.

Take the time to practice and use these techniques when ever you begin to feel overcome with worry or stress. 

If you would like to learn some other methods to address stressful days or situations, consider calling FASAP to speak to one of our professional counseling staff. Contact FASAP at 936-8660 or email fasap@umich.edu     

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Should Mom Still Be Driving?

Convincing and elderly loved one that she should no longer drive can be difficult.  For many older adults, driving equals independence.  A driver evaluation can be a useful resource when you or your loved ones are unsure of their driving abilities.
The Area Agency on Aging I-B lists the following options for senior driver education and evaluations:

  • AARP 55-Alive
    (888) 227-7669

  • Traffic Improvement Association Mature Driver Workshop
    (248) 334-4971

  • MedRehab (University of Michigan) Drive-ability Program
    (734) 998-7911

  • William Beaumont Hospital Driver Rehabilitation Program
    (248) 258-3715

For additional information on senior drivers, please visit:
http://www.aaa1b.org/display.php?catid=9

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Eldercare Resources –Successful Aging

The Work/Life Resource Center offers an information and referral service for those with eldercare needs, locally and nationwide.  As part of this service, a feature with eldercare articles and local events will be included in Resolutions. In this issue:

Successful Aging Education Program
Aging with Attitude: A New Stage of Life
Tuesday, May 22, 12:00 - 1:30 p.m.
Turner Senior Resource Center 2401 Plymouth Road, Ann Arbor.

Presenters: Mary Rumman, LMSW, Turner Geriatric Clinic, and Althea Rooks Jordan, UM Volunteer Services.

Are you thinking about retirement, or has someone close to you recently retired? As with any transition, planning can make the change easier and more enjoyable. Through this presentation, learn retirement strategies so that you can expand your knowledge, explore your creativity, and enhance your life. Light lunch provided.

No cost, but registration is required. 
Call 734-998-9353 to register.
Co-sponsored with Blueprint for Aging; the University of Michigan Work/Life Resource Center and the University of Michigan Faculty and Staff Assistance Program.

Eldercare Resources:

Strength for Caring
http://www.strengthforcaring.com/manual/index.html

National Family Caregivers Association
http://www.nfcacares.org

University Eldercare Resources:
The Work/Life Resource Center
http://www.umich.edu/~hraa/worklife/
Eldercare information and referral service available to all faculty, staff, and students. 
Phone, email, or face-to-face consultations can be scheduled.
Call 936-8677

Turner Senior Resource Center
http://www.med.umich.edu/geriatrics/tsrc/tsrc.pdf
The Center has a wide variety of programs for seniors and caregivers. 

Housing Bureau for Seniors
http://www.med.umich.edu/seniors
HBS has housing counselors available to assist with locating housing resources in Washtenaw County, and with resources to help your loved one stay in her home.

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Anatomy of a Mediation
By Sally Johnson Director, Mediation Services and Building Great Places to Work

This is for those of you who may have wondered how, and why, mediation works, and whether it’s the right choice for you.   

 

Analysis of a mediation

Picture Steve, a relative newcomer to UM, hired as an assistant editor for one of the college’s alumni newsletters. 

Picture Emily, Steve’s supervisor, who edits the newsletter, and reports to an assistant dean in the college.

Steve has come to believe that Emily doesn’t like him much and that his job is in danger, and he’s asked Mediation Services if they can help.

Step One:  Emily has to agree.  Mediation Services is ALWAYS voluntary, NEVER obligatory.  And, since Steve has already talked to the mediator, Emily also has a right to a one-on-one meeting with the mediator, if she wants it.

Step Two:  Emily says she’s happy to mediate, and bypasses an individual meeting.

Step Three:  Steve, Emily and the mediator Mel are now gathered at a table in a conference room away from their school, for an initial 2-hour meeting.

Step Four:  Mel begins by asking each to commit to hold the discussions at this table

  • Completely confidential – not to be shared with anyone else in their work group
  • Completely guilt free – what’s said here cannot become grounds for either a grievance, or for discipline –

…and asks if certain ground rules are acceptable: 

  • Listen, and do your best not to interrupt (sometimes feelings can run high!)
  • Avoid nasty language or name calling.
  • Feel free to ask for a break or for private time with the mediator, whenever you feel like that would help.

Steve and Emily commit to confidentiality, and agree to the ground rules (they would be free to ask for other ground rules if they wanted to.

Step Five:  Mel asks each to start with an “opening statement” of what’s not working right, what’s bothering them, and what each is hoping can be achieved through mediation, and to be as complete and specific as possible.  Mel reminds them that they may each hear things they don’t like and don’t agree with, but that’s the reason they are here.

Since Steve is the one who asked for mediation, generally he’s the one who would speak first.  Mel reminds Emily that she should listen without interrupting, and that she can ask questions if she really doesn’t understand something Steve says, but that she is NOT to “correct” or “rebut” or argue with anything he says.  This is Steve’s opportunity to name the issues he believes need to be aired and discussed, and Emily simply needs to hear what those are.

When Steve finishes, Mel asks if there’s anything else he wants to add, and asks Emily if there is anything that wasn’t clear. 

Then its Emily’s turn for her statement and Steve is reminded to listen in order to understand what concerns Emily is bringing to the table, with the same reminders to Steve, and the same questions at the end.

At that point Mel also asks what either of them heard that was new information, or that came as a surprise to them,  to help both gain insight into the problem.

Step Six:  Gradually, the three of them together narrow down the issues: 

  • Emily’s approachability – she tends to be away from her desk in meetings, and when she’s in, she tends to seem irritable if Steve has a question
  • Steve’s writing skills – Emily always re-edits what Steve writes, and he wants to know if she thinks he’s a poor writer
  • Steve’s understanding of the college, its goals and its pressures – Emily is worried that Steve isn’t really understanding the whole academic environment

Step Seven:  Some misunderstandings are cleared up almost instantly.  Emily assures Steve that she sees him as a really good writer, but is under pressure from her boss to double check on everything that goes out in the newsletter, and therefore re-edits everyone’s work.  She also apologizes for seeming irritable, saying it’s really just feeling rushed, and asks a very open question:  what could she do to seem more approachable?

At that point, a second meeting is scheduled within a week, for the remainder of the issues to be discussed.

Step Eight:  At the second meeting, three trial agreements are reached:

  • Emily will try some tips she’s received, to seem less irritable.
  • Steve will schedule time with several faculty members and with Emily’s boss, for “mentoring” about academia and the research environment.
  • Emily has decided to submit a few written pieces from Steve and other writers without re-editing, for feedback from her own boss.  Maybe she can lighten her own work load.

Step Nine:  Mel offers to write up those agreements, if that’s useful – it’s Emily and Steve’s choice.  They decide it would be helpful.  Mel reminds them that the write-up is a confidential document that will belong to them alone; that the Mediation Office doesn’t even keep a copy; and that their commitment to confidentiality means that they shouldn’t even share it with others at their college unless both agreed to do that, together.

Step Ten:  Mel also asks about making a follow-up call at some point, to see how things are going.  Emily asks if they can meet again, instead of the follow-up call, and a follow-up meeting is set up for two months later.

And that’s how it works.

What worked, and why?
The steps themselves are important.  Here’s why: 

  • The voluntary nature of mediation allows each person to decide that yes, this seems worth trying, and therefore to come in with some motivation to resolve the issues.
  • The commitment to confidentiality and to “guilt-free” conversation cannot be 100% guaranteed.  Nevertheless, as psychologists will tell you, once a person has given their word, they are strongly motivated to keep their word. Therefore, this step does two things:
    • It keeps the dispute from spreading in and damaging the work group.
    • It encourages the individuals at the table to open up and be really honest with each other.
  • The “opening statements” allow each individual to know that he or she is really being heard, rather than brushed off, contradicted, or interrupted – and this is a too-infrequent experience for most of us.
  • Acknowledging that you have heard something that surprised you, or that you didn’t know before, PROVES to the other person that you really did hear them.  This is a very powerful moment in most mediation processes.
  • Narrowing down the issues does two things:
    • It simplifies the conversation, and makes it easier to drop irrelevant sidetracks.
    • It allows each party to decide, at that point, whether he/she is truly comfortable discussing those issues.  Each has the right to say, “No – I’m not comfortable discussing that – can we take that back ‘off the table’?”
  • Making agreements that are “trial” agreements acknowledges that broken trust may not yet have been mended – but that the people involved are willing to give it a try in order to rebuild trust gradually, as it must be.
  • Putting the agreements in writing allows both individuals to see what they have agreed to, and to make corrections if they feel something was mis-stated.
  • Arranging some kind of follow-up creates a sense of commitment to the trial period.

Overall: 

  • Using a mediator relieves the individuals involved of the responsibility for “managing” or “steering” the meeting, and frees them to think instead about what they are hearing and what they themselves are hoping.
  • The mediator, rather than “escalating” a disagreement, actually de-escalates it, by allowing feelings to surface in a safe setting.
  • The mediator, since he or she has no stake in the disagreement, can much more easily hear and interpret what each person is expressing, without any danger of taking it personally.  Therefore they can assist the people in the dispute to make their points more clearly, and can also offer feedback to the individuals about ways to communicate more effectively.

As a reminder, mediation service is completely off the record.  There are no “case files” kept, and there is no connection in any way to either departmental or University personnel files.  Mediators never make reports back to any part of your school, college, or unit.

More questions?  Please feel free to call us at 215-4789.

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To a Healthy Mid- Life Transition?
Tom Waldecker, Director, FASAP

One of the normal parts of maturing is having a mid-life transition. It is a very natural process that we experience.  Normally this occurs for many of us in our early to mid 40’s.  Some common issues that arise with the "transition ”include being bored, challenged or confused a bit about ones current life situation. At times this includesquestioning ones thoughts of the yearning to be more adventurous.

So if you are experiencing some thoughts of mid life questioning or transition take some time to focus on some new coping and energizing tools. Give yourself permission to accept the feeling you are having and say it is okay to develop some new goals. Check out some new ideas, consider joining a community group, volunteering with a community agency or talking to someone about your feelings.  Take some time to reenergize the relationships you’re in and spend some uninterrupted time with those that you are close to and important to you.  It is also helpful to try and increase your personal wellness and exercise plan when you are feeling in a lull too.

If you would like to discuss your own feelings and/or develop a personal action plan please consider calling and speaking to one of the FASAP counselors at 936-8660, or email fasap@umich.edu             
        

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Updated Resources & Ease of Navigation Highlight FASAP Website Revision


FASAP has recently revised its Website ( http://www.umich.edu/~fasap/) to increase ease of navigation and update many of the resources it lists. Please take a moment to check it out when you have a chance.  It contains an array of information about services available and recommendations for addressing issues ranging from dealing with grief, returning to work after a medical leave and a newly created FAQ (frequently asked questions) section.

 

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Staff Profiles: Molly Miklosovic & Judy Collins

Molly Miklosovic
New Project facilitator for the Emotional and Mental Health Initiative in the Workplace

We are pleased to have Molly Miklosovic join us as the new project facilitator for a newly funded project for promoting emotional health in the workplace. This is a two year project which is part of the campus-wide Michigan Healthy Community initiative. One of the main goals of the project is to create a web site that hosts a wide array of resources and information on emotional health topics and resources both on campus and throughout the community.

Molly received her MPH from the UM School of Public Health with a concentration in Health Behavior and Health Promotion. Molly most recently was a project manager at M-Care where she was responsible for a number of business projects involving medical and behavioral health services. In addition she previously coordinated the Asthma Health Outcomes Project at the School of Public Health and worked for the Division of General Medicine in the Health System for a program researching health care decision-making.

Molly is married to Brad and they are the proud parents of Zoe, age 3, and Pavol (PJ) age 5 months. She enjoys playing with her children, singing and playing the guitar, reading novels, baking chocolate treats, and working on her new perennial garden at her home in Whitmore Lake.  Molly is proud to be part of the Michigan Healthy Community initiative and is excited about playing a role in improving access to emotional health resources for all her University colleagues who do such important work around campus. She says, “Thank you to everyone for the warm welcome I have received! I look forward to working with you and getting to know you all better.”

If you have any suggestions as to what might be helpful in a resource guide for emotional health issues please feel free to reach her at mmikloso@umich.edu.

 

Judy Collins
New Research Coordinator for Work/Life Programs

The University of Michigan Children’s Center and Center for Working Families have both been important research sites for many years for those interested in children’s early development. Researchers from Psychology, Education, Music and Nursing regularly work with the children in these centers to explore various aspects of human growth and development. In an effort to expand these opportunities for collaboration to other researchers and to other research sites throughout the community the Work/Life Programs created a full time Research Coordinator role.  We are pleased to announce that Judy Collins has accepted this new position.

Judy is currently a teacher at UMCC in the toddler room and has been there for seven years. She holds a Master's degree in Education from UM and did her undergraduate work at MSU. Judy has also worked as a research assistant with High/Scope Educational Research Foundation and was previously a preschool and elementary school age teacher at St. Cecilia's Grade School in Detroit.

Judy’s experience as a teacher will serve her well given her first hand knowledge regarding the research process as it has applied to her classroom. We look forward to our partnership with faculty from many areas as we expand opportunities for research regarding children and families. Please welcome Judy to the HRAA team.

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FASAP AND THE WORK/LIFE RESOURCE CENTER WANT TO SPREAD THE WORD

A representative of FASAP and the WLRC can come to your department or staff meeting and make a short (10 to 20 minute) presentation on the range of services that are offered by the two programs. 

To arrange a presentation please call 936-8660 and speak to a program representative.

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resolutions is published in January, May and September of every year. To obtain additional information regarding our services contact FASAP, Mediation Services or Work/Life Resource Center at (734) 936-8660.

Hospital employees may contact the Employee Assistance Program (EAP)
at 763-5409 for counseling service.