Peer evaluations of chapters; typos, formatting, etc. are left as received.

2. Big Bang
The intro was a big perplexing..each time they interested me into reading
the paper, they would come up with a reason why I shouldn't. It would be
we could discuss this, but we cant, etc.
I felt the body was choppy in the text and presentation of the argument.
They seem to rush from topic to topic without truly discussing each topic
thorouhgly enough. Transition between each topic is weak at best.
The summary was the best part of the paper (not only because it was over)
but because the style of the presentation was interesting. Much like a
newsflash style to wrap up what is currently being discovered.
Extras: not enough photos to spice up the text...the photos that were
used just didn't seem to fit the text correctly.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 2
The Big Bang--It Sure Was BIG!-Blair Rothstein and Chris LaRocco
I think that Blair and Chris did an excellent job on their chapter. They
managed to make an abstract concept concrete; a difficult subject
digestable. I truly enjoyed the colorful manner in which they presented
the Big Bang, and I was impressed by the depth of their analysis. POINTS:4
This beginning chapter takes a deep look into the beginnings of
the universe. More pictures could have been included to break up the
frequency of the wording. Titles headings could have been larger to
attract more attention to them. The "Now What" section gives a good
overview of what can be done, however, it possibly assumes that the
reader knows more than they really do.O Overall this web page receives a
score of 2.38
I really liked your use of questions. It made it very easy to
follow you paper and lead the reader through it. They were also
interesting questions. The conclusion was very good too. It had some
great ideas in it. However, you say we will never know exactly how our
universe started. Isn't this a bit too finite of a statement. I think
is is possible that we will know one day. I see the point that the
information we have now is mostly soundly based hypotheses and we are not
100 % sure about these but maybe noe day we will find concrete proof.
All together you did a very good job.
The writing style was very good since it took a neutral stand and
presented us with information in order to let us decide what we thought.
Some of the information could have been elaborated upon. For Example,
since the topic was to be the Big Bang, it would have been nice to see
more information about its origin and to hear alternative theories
regarding the formation of the universe. Some of the topics left us
without a clear conclusion: Example
"This phenomenon of galaxies moving farther away from each other is
known as the red shift. As light from distant galaxies approach earth
there is an increase of space between earth and the galaxy, which leads
to wavelengths being stretched."
It would have been helpful for you to mention that a higher wavelength
correspondes to red light and low wavelength is high frequency blue
light.
Overall, the paper was good. Considering that the theory of
universe formation is speculative, Chris and Blair did a good job.
Perhaps the web page could have used a bit more pictures and a
background. Overall score: 3
The Big Bang: The introduction captures the reader's interest by
inviting the reader to delve into the text. It seems impossible to
tackle all of the uncertainties about our creation, but an excellent
attempt is (in the author's words) "through an examination of what is
known about the Big Bang itself, the age of the universe, and the
synthesis of the first atoms." The paper notes very important
observations and backs them up with proven scientific data. By posing
rhetorical questions within the text and integrating in essential
figures, the authors grasp the reader and keep him interested. Another
advantage is the usage of small paragraphs. Never do the authors bore
the reader or overelaborate on particular topics. An improvement could
be made by adding more figures and more extensive captions. The paper is
presented very well in a step-by-step process; however, further
subdivisions may help the reader skim for needed research at a faster
pace. It is a great idea to include current research as well. The
conclusion is good; mixing scientific theories and personal beliefs is an
important technique when making a statement within a paper. Overall, the
text is very well written, more pictures could have been used, and the
glossary could have been made longer. (3)
Chapter 2
Interesting clear writing. Good balance of scientific expressions and
laymen's explanations. Score=2
Chapter 2: Big Bang
Overall, a very fine discussion of a complex topic. I especially
liked your use of graphics to add to the discussion. You might want to
delve a little deeper into some of the theories of what existed before
the Bang and how it may have come to occur. Otherwise a very nice page.
Score: 4
Chapter 2--The Big Bang
I thought that this was well-written and contained a very good
description of the Big Bang process. I especially liked the image of the
timeline of the Big Bang. The chapter contained a good amount of context
and description of the elements and age of the universe. So,
content-wise, it was very good. However, the chapter was lacking in
images, graphs, figures, etc., so the presentation was not as good as it
could have been. I give it a score of 2.
This was a good paper on a tough subject. It was written in such a way
that was understandable to the reader and did not require much prior
knowledge about the subject, which was a good thing. It was written in a
logical order, but I think that breaking it into more subheadings would
have been helpful. For example, the part on the Big Bang could have been
broken into subheadings such as Edwin Hubble, Arno Penzias and Robert
Wilson, and NASAs COBE satellite. You could also put subdivisions in
"The First Atoms" part such as Matter and Antimatter and Protons and
Neutrons. These subdivisions aren't necessary, but I think that they
would help the reader. I think that it would be helpful to define
antimatter in the text because not all readers will know what this is and
antimatter is important in understanding the rest of the section. Good
analogy with the lighthouses in the "Age of the Universe" section. This
helps the reader pictiure the concept that you are discussing. I think
that this chapter could have used a few more graphics, it would have
helped to break up the text. Overall, excellent job. It is obvious that
this paper required a lot of research and the authors are knowlegeable
about the topic.
This chapter dealt very extensively and analytically with the big bang
theory, and the creation and age of the universe. Many of the individual
aspects of the theory were addressed. It would mabye help to include
other possibilities of what people think too. A few more graphs or
tables would enhance this chapter's appearance.
1)The Big Bang- It Sure Was Big-
Overall, I find this paper to be average. On the positive side
the paper touched on key topics. I particularly liked the use of
current research, such as the 1995 discovery of primordial helium. In
addition, the text is well interspersed with interesting illustrations.
However, I found the text too choppy. The paper seemed to jump from
topic to topic instead of progressing coherently twoards an end.
Perhaps, a more in depth study of some of the topics covered would tie
things together.
Grade-2
Chapter 2 The Big Bang
When first looking at this presentation I thought that the
presenation style was good. The initial photo got me interested and the
flashing sign was a nice touch. The other photo of the expanding Big
Bang was great because it allowed me to visualize the technical aspects
of the text. The third and final photo was nice, but it didn9t seem to
be necessary for the Big Bang topic. More photos and diagrams would have
made the presentation of the project more appealing. The content was
very good, and I was able to understand their good explantions of the
technical aspects of the theory. One thing they need to show is that the
Big Bang exploded so quickly that it defied the laws of physics. It was
able to do this because it was creating space, not moving through it.
grade=3
The Big Bang: It Sure was Big
Presentation: The presentation was good very informative. Considering
it was the first given I thought it was equal to the others. Good use of
overheads.
Paper Content: Good sequential organization of the processes involved
with the big bang. I liked the fact the scientists associated with the
theories were mentioned - gave it a historical reference of how the
theories evolved. Possibly more subheadings where possible.
Figures: Figure were used well to help understand the material presented
and illustrated important points, but I would have liked to have seen
more. It is important to catch someone eye and plain text does not;
based on that fact I would have liked to seen more.
Score: 3
"It Sure was Big"
In critiquing my classmates Chris LaRocco and Blair Rothstein's project
over the internet, it occured to me that the had no shortage of
imformation concerning their topic "The Big Bang". This evidently lead
to their well written and dynamically described textual aspect of their
project. However, their project was had somewhat of a lack of visual
stimulus of which I held heavily in grading the projects. However, one
must take into account the fact that their project was based on "The Big
Bang" and not the solar system where a plethora of visual evidence can be
readily attained. Considering this fact, though, graphs and figures
could have been supplanted in lieu of other such photographs making the
project much more interesting. This lack of visual references created a
rather dull presentation of the imformation, hence my evaluation of their
project must be labeled a 3.
Paper 2: Big Bang
Good introduction, making very clear distinctions between fact
and hypothesis. It would seem that the 2nd and 3rd to last sentences in
the second big bang paragraph are contradictory... the big bang marks the
beginning of expansion; before it time and any other events are
irrelevant and unfathomable. Also, your description of Hubble's history
should preceed the explanatory paragraph reading "About 15..." This
Hubble model could be made a bit more clear.
I was very fascinated by your description of matter/antimatter
just after the Big Bang. There are times when a better knowledge of
apostrophe placement would be good; also, you may in the future not want
to end a term paper with a question. Otherwise, a good and nicely
detailed paper with good pictures!
3pts
Big Bang Chapter (Chris and Blair):
I felt that your chapter was very informative. This team stuck
to simply talking about the big bang with out wandering off into other
issues. They gave a good background on how the big bang occurred, after
the big bang, the Hubbell theory, and how to age our universe. The
paragraph which was most convincing to me on the Big Bang theory was when
they actually gave some solid facts on why the theory is accepted. I
feel it is important to back up an idea such as the Big Bang with some
proof. The one thing the homepage was lacking was some more pictures!
The chapter was informative but I feel pictures could have made such a
complicated theory easier to visualize. Visually the homepage could use
some touching up but atleast your content was very thorough. IUve always
wondered how they came up with the Big Bang idea and what proof they had
of it even existing. Oh yeah, and I really liked your subtitles on the
homepage. Overall nice homepage. Grade: 3 points
GROUP 1: Chris LaRocco and Blair Rothstein
This chapter was about the Big Bang theory. While one could
argue that the title "The Big Bang: It Sure was Big" could use a little
improvement, there is certainly no doubt that the chapter could use some
more pictures and tables. I believe I only counted 2 or 3 total. While
the text was informative and anaylitcal, some additional pictures would
definitely give the reader a better perspective about the situation Chris
and Blair were trying to portray. I did find it interesting, however,
that they noted that the Big Bang theory is constantly being revised.
I also thought they wrote a fairly strong conclusion. RATING: 2
The Big Bang: It sure was big
-Your writing skills are very good. I enjoyed the philosophical approach
you took for the introduction and conclusion. This approach really
softened men to the reasing which was franckly on a very complex subject.
-Since this was such a tuff topic their were many words that were unknown
to me it would have been very helpful to me if you would have defined
them. Ideally a link to the definition of a word could have been
incorperated into the text. This is something I do not know how to do so
I understand if it is not possible. I would have been helpful if you
could have bol; faced the complex terms and greatly expanded your glossary.
-This topic is so complex and technical that it got a little dry. It
would be a bit more appealing to the reader if a few more pictures could
have been added to jazz it up.
-Your writing is very good and you did a good job of explaining a very
complex topoic.
Chapter 2: The Big Bang: It Sure Was Big!
Points: 3
It goes without saying that this chapter, like all of the
chapters, is well done. I especially like how the text, RIt Sure Was BigS
blinks in a highlighted-text sort of way. It is this sort of this that
technology makes possible for the advancement of not only humankind but
also our GS 265 grades. However, while on the subject of the title, I do
not like the set-up at the beginning of this chapter. The picture of the
universe precedes the title of the chapter and squeezes it into the far
right side of the page/screen. RChris LaRocco and Blair Rothstein
present:S also precedes and, perhaps supersedes, the title of the
chapter. Not to say that these two donUt deserve due credit, but it makes
the beginning of the chapter somewhat of a jumble. It is good to see
that the aforementioned picture has alongside it a caption (pictures with
captions are good),but its location could be confused as a part of the
title itself. Everything else in the chapter flows very well. The
full-screen picture of NASAUs COBE satellite is an especially nice
touch. Not to mention the other pictures which do lend to the ambiance
and clarification of the chapter as a whole.
Chapter 2 Grade 2
Chapter 2 had some interesting stuff about the big bang theory and the
beginning of the universe. I thought their chapter could have used a few
mor pictures to help build up their argument. But overall the paper was
very informative.
3. Galaxies
The into was interesting and it made me want to read their text and
arguments.
The body, however, left me lost through most of the text. The
presentation made it appear that the authors too were lost in their
understanding of the subject. One redeeming aspect of the body was the
example of pizza dough, it really hit home the point of the text in a
common example that I was able to mentally picture.
The conclusion was a great wrap up and appeared to be full of "energy".
I was left dissapointed after the text and the conclusion was written
well enough to alleviate some of that disappointment.
EXTRAS: One photo? that's it?...was quite disappointed. This team
should have done more research to find relevant photos.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 1
The Soup That Would Be A Star-Jeff Haaz and Paul Brown
Wow, purple! If the dictionary were printed in purple, I'd look at it
every day. Along with the purpleness, I noticed something that is either
a typo or a conversion error: the commas in the middle of words- are
those supposed to be apostrophes? Beyond the surface, I was somewhat
bored when reading this. There were way too many in-text citations (by
the same author, no less) accompanying facts that could have easily been
paraphrased. Also, there could have been more pictures. Stellar Evolution: The Life and Death of Our Luminous Neighbors-Arthur
Holland And Mark Williams
It looks to me like someone made a huge mistake here: the chapter that
would be "Stellar Evolution:The Life and Death of Our Luminous Neighbors"
is "The Soup That Would Be a Star"! It is a much better version of the
soup- cooler, more abundant pictures, bolded terms...What's going on
here? I'm confused. Well, good job Jeff and Paul.
POINTS:3
At first I questioned the title of this web page, perhaps a
better title could be used so that the reader does not have to feel
confused before they actually start reading. The subject heading made
each section stand out well. Why are the sujcet headings larger than the
title? Excellent idea to have the glossy terms in bold. This lets me
know that I can look for those term. According to content, this web page
presents the information in a simplistic manner. In reading this page I
did not feel I needed to be a scientist to understand. Overall this web
page receives a score if 2.4
I thought your chapter was very well written. I twas not too
confusing or minutely detailed so as to lose me while I was reading it.
The glossary was very good too and really helped to understand those
things which were confusing. The pictures are very nice. However, the
first three all look the same, same for some of the last ones. What are
they pictures of too? I think you should include captions. If the
pictures are of different things and each illustrate different points
then keep them in. But, if they are just there for good looks I don't
think you should use ones that are so similar. It gets very boring but
captions could definately clear this up. It also seems a bit short but I
did not notice that any information was left out. Over all, I really liked
your chapter and enjoyed reading it.
This chapter had some very nice pictures. It would have been
good if the pictures had labels with them to inform us of what they are.
The paper was a bit short though. There were only two topics covered:
Stellar formations and Galaxy formation. There are many subtopics which
were left uncovered. For example, are there any factors which favor the
formation of a barred galaxy over the formation of a spiral? Also, some
pictures of this would have been nice (especially since you had pictures
during your presentation).
The bolding of the glossary terms was nice. It made it easy to
know what words I could look up. Spelling and grammar was a little
incorrect (hudrogen?) Overall, the information that was presented was
interesting. How about putting in your own thoughts at the end of the paper?
Overall score: 2
The soup that would be a star: The introduction is intriguing yet does
not grasp the reader and convince him to read more. Bold-facing glossary
termed words is a great idea indicating to the reader that there are aids
in understanding available to him. More subdivisions are necessary; with
few subdivisions, it is difficult for the reader to pinpoint information
necessary for research. The pictures included on the page are beautiful
but lack captions. Paragraphs are short, concise, and to the point.
References are not needed within the text. Concluding remarks are good
but the authors should have integrated their own opinions into the text. (2)
Chapter 3
Perhaps they can make links at the end of their paper. A bit short..
needs to be more in depth. They also need to paraphrase and take out the
citations. Nice pix. Score= 2
Chapter 3: Stellar Soup
Nice coverage of stellar formation. I felt the section on star
formation was your strongest. I would lie to see more details in the
section on galaxy formation however. You touched on the processes that
go into the galaxy's birth but didn't really explain how they come
together. Also I found a number of misspellings in your page. Nothing
serious, just thought you might want to know. Your web links don't work
either. Probably just some bad HTML code.
Score: 2
Chapter 3--The Soup that would be a star
I really liked the opening image and introduction, but there
are 2 typos in it. Highlighting the glossary terms makes the reading
much easier and also enhances the presentation, but there are just too
many and it gets cluttered. Great description of steller formation, I
thought the images were great. The galaxy formation conclusion, however,
seems a bit rushed. The glossary is really big, I don't think that it
needs to be that big. Overall, I thought it was a great chapter and
extremely well written and easy to read. I give it a score of 3.
My first comment about this chapter is EXCELLENT GRAPHICS!!! They were
interesting and really drew me into the chapter. The introduction to
this chapter was intriguing and creative. I liked the way that all the
glossary words were in bold print. The organization of this chapter was
good and it progressed in logical order. I noticed a few spelling
mistakes that need correction. They are in the "Galaxy Formation
Conclusion". The words ingredients and important are spelled wrong!!
Also, I think that the apostrophe key was used wrong and the comma key
was used instead. I know that these are small mistakes but they are
distracting to the reader. Also, I think captions for the figures would
be helpful. Overall, the text to this chapter was informative and
adequetely covered the subject. With a few minor grammatical changes,
this chapter will be perfect. Good Job.
This chapter explained the formation of stars and galaxies. It dealt
extensively with the many theories and explanations scientists have had.
The pictures selected for this chapter were really nice. They helped to
show clearly what was being talked about. Using bold text for the
glossery terms was also a good idea.
2)The Soup That Would Be a Galaxy
This chapter is slightly below average. The authors use some
excellent illustrations to augment their text. I also like the
highlighted glossary terms. However, the text seems incomplete. The
first section on galaxy formation needs some more information,
especially next to the informative section on star formation. In
addition, the text needs a good proof reading as grammatical errors make
it difficult to read.
Grade-2
3) The soup that would be a star:
The viewer is greeted with the word, "Introd" but, beyond that,
the organization of the page is interesting. Although, the authors seem
to highlight the most important words in boldface, they do not offer any
real definition for some of them within the body of the text. The
section on galaxy classification seems to go rather quickly yet, I am
unsure as to how much more could be said. The "Galaxy Formation
Conclusion" seems somewhat redundant and unnecessary. The section on
Stellar Formation is a bit more clear, although still terse. overall,
the images are what I found most intriguing while the text left
something to be desired. SCORE- 2
Chapter 3 The soup that would be a star
The look of this project as a whole was very good. The placement
of pictures and text was good in that they did not have large blocks of
text followed by a picture, rather they were evenly dispursed. I also
liked the large headings before each topic because this really made it
easier for me to comprehend in sections rather than a large mass of
information. The content of this chapter seems difficult, but they
explain it in a fashion which the layman can understand. When reading
about certain topics, this presentation placed the pictures next to the
text which respectively coincided with it, and this was a very nice
touch. Captions would have been nice, but overall grade = 5
The Soup that would be a Star
Presentation: The presentation made good use of overheads and the board
to help demonstrate and understand stellar formation.
Paper Content: More Headings/Subheadings, because your audience will
look at the headings most likely and if it is something that interests
them then they will look into that heading and or read the entire paper.
I felt that the organization of the paper was good, additionally I liked
your introduction.
Figures: Need more figures, however, I do realize that for many chapters
figures were hard to find. My only concern is that plain text usually
will not draw someones attention - figures will...
Score: 2.5
Paper 3: Stars and Galaxies
This paper showed of a good use of outline and organizational
technique. Some very interesting pictures enhanced the paper. In many
instances punctuation like apostrophes and colons are missing.
Most of the paper had clear, succinct explanations. Although
your pictures are good for aid and filler sake, it seemed that your
content was a bit too brief.
2pts
The Soup That Would be a Star (Paul and Jeff):
The chapter was very informative but I felt it could have been
improved in certain areas. The content in the chapter was very good but
the organization could have been better. I think you guys needed more
subtitles in your chapter so it would be easier for a reader to follow
along with all your many ideas on the different galaxy shapes, etc... I
found myself getting lost on some of the things you were talking about
mainly because of organization. The chapter also had many grammatical
errors which can easily be fixed, you might want to proof read it again.
Visually the pictures were outstanding! I could really picture what was
going on. I think your chapter is nice and has very good ideas but I
think by putting more organization into your ideas and proof reading it
again it could be even better. Other people who have no background on
the formation of stars and galaxies who want to read it will have an
easier time following along. Overall it was a good homepage. Grade: 1.5
points
3. Soup that Would be a Star
This paper gave decent explanations of the topic, but the paper is
somewhat brief. I felt that the authors could have gone into more
details instead of just mentioning topics. After reading the paper I was
not that impressed with the overall paper. I give this paper a two.
GROUP 2: Paul Brown and Jeff Haaz
An immediate problem occurs in this chapter when, within the
first sentence, two typos "univere,s and one,s" occur. In fact, the
first sentence itself is quite awkward: "Just as one's own birth into
this world, the birth of the universe's galaxies and stars is just as
crucial to our existence." I like how all the glossary terms are in bold
within the chapter. As opposed to group 1, Paul and Jeff frequently use
good pictures and charts, especially the picture of the spiral galaxy.
Also as opposed to group 1, unfortunately, there is far too little text.
This chapter needs about 1-2 pages more of text and about 2-3 fewer
pictures. Perhaps group 2 and group 1 could work out a trade of sorts.
RATING: 2
Chapter 3: The Soup That Would Be a Star
Points: 1
I was very disappointed by this chapter. I found it very
confusing reading from the beginning of the chapter as it started in a
very RjumpyS fashion. After a while, it did read more smoothly, but I
could not get over the initial RchoppinessS that persisted until probably
the middle of the chapter. Granted, the material covered is complex
stuff, but that is all the more reason, to me, to tread very slowly and
smoothly when trying to convey such information. Alongside being
confusing, this chapter could use a little bit more proofreading. These
are simple enough mistakes to make, but they are also just as easy to
detect and do away with. A few more criticisms: In this chapter, as in
the last, there are layout problems with the title. Why is the title not
capitalized or underlined, or boldfaced? The subject headings are in a
larger font than the title, not to mention the authors names. It is nice
here also that the word RSTARS blinks, however, it would be even nicer if
the rest of the title were as aesthetically pleasing. This chapter did
have, to the authorsU credit, a lot of nice-sized pictures of galaxies
and other galactic stuff. The vocab words were also clearly boldfaced.
Chapter 3 Grade 3
I thougth this chapter was extremely well done. The chapter followed a
natural order of progression and it had many pictures to illustrate its
purpose. The key for this chapeter was that it made all the key terms in
bold.
4. Star
Pictures, Pictures, Pictures.....that is what is needed at the
begining of this web page to attract the reader. When the page is opened
perhaps a picture could be used to pull the reader into the subject. The
use of the bold faced glossy terms made this section eaiser to use. In
looking at the content I find that the material is very scientific and
some readers may be turned away because of this. Especially in the
introduction when the subject heading was introduction and why you should
care, I still found myself wondering why. This could be especially
problimatic for the reader surfing the net simply to look. If this web
page was more inviting then perhaps just the general person that is not a
science buf would stop to read. Overall grade for this web page 2.32.
Stellar Evolution: The Life and Death of Our Luminous Neighbors- Arthur
Holland and Mark Williams
This page was, how shall I say it- just okay. It was written like a
textbook, which was nice and informative, but I sensed no degree of
creativity whatsoever, except for, perhaps, in a few of the headings.
The pictures were good, but the captions were strangely placed, and the
italicized font was somewhat difficult to read. POINTS:2
Your chapter is very informative. You have done good research
and give indepth explanations on everything. However, it gets very
meticulous reading your chapter because it is so in depth and technical.
I had trouble concentrating on the entire thing because i felt like much
of it was over my head. It may just be that your topic is very technical
so thi sis impossible to aviod. Your pictures are used well except you
used the same grapg twice. That seems pretty redundant. It was well
written and in depthly discussed.
Excellent paper. It was written in a manor which was not a
boring list of facts. The authors provided a good clear explanation of
the topics, supported by pictures. The humor was also a bonus.
A few notes: The title of the intro is "Why you should care".
After reading the paragraph, I still didn't know why I should care. The
title doesn't match the paragraph. Perhaps listing how stellar evolution
directly affects me, it would be more motivating to continue reading.
Also, you say that white holes (the product of Black holes) are created
to restore matter and balance. Does this mean all the things the black
hole "sucks in" is regurgitated by the white hole and just thrown in
space? How do black holes correlate with the theory that "matter is
neither created or destroyed"?
Overall, a good paper to read. I enjoyed it. Score: 4
Stellar Evolution: The introduction is appropriate, but it really does
not convince the reader that "he really should care." Using diagrams
within the text is a good way to aid in understanding, but more of a
caption is needed to describe to the reader what is being conveyed. The
bold faced words are a great idea in helping the reader understand the
text. The shortness of the paragraphs is crucial to keeping the reader's
attention. The step-by-step analysis that is used is an important tactic
in description. Text is well written on an appropriate level and figures
are used very nicely. The paper is very well written and it is nice that
the authors give their opinions at the end of the chapter. Comparatively,
the chapter is longer than many of the other ones and conveys more
information not only through text usage, but through figures as well. The
glossary is very good and especially in a chapter like this one, where the
reader is unfamiliar with so many of the scientific terms, it is
necessary. I'm surprised however that more references were not used. In
conclusion, a very good chapter and quite a lot of information. (4)
Chapter 4. Great paper. Good glossary and perhaps they could have some
links as well.Score=3
Chapter 4: Stellar Evolution
Your paper itself is quite good. You do an excellent job of
explaining your topics. Being a web page however, I think a few more
graphics, just to break the monotony of text might be nice. The pictures
you do have do an excellent job of adding to the story. Also you might
want to take advantage of the web and add a few links. Overall, very
good work. PS:It might be a problem with my browser, but there appear to
be random letters inserted into some of your text.
Score: 3
Chapter 4--Steller Evolution
The paper is filled with facts and that makes it really
educational, but also makes it way too dry. There should be more
narration to go along with the facts. The chapter had good presentation
and great images (although they perhaps should be reduced in size). It
was well-written and it is informative. But, the glossary is too long. I
give it a score of 4.
Wow! This chapter is very detailed. It is obvious that the authors
reseached this topic quite a bit. The introduction was good and i
appreciated the fact that you put a definition of stellar evolution into
your introduction. Good idea for readers who aren't familiar with your
topic. The graphics in this chapter were good and I think that you did a
great job of tying them in and explaining them in the text. I thought
that the figure captions were especially helpful. I liked the way that
you inserted definitions into the text (such as degenerate) so the reader
does not have to skip to the end of the chapter to learn a word they
don't understand. A couple of minor suggestions: don't put the
subheadings into italics, they are very small and difficult to read. In
the subheading "stages in the life of an evolving star" there is a the
that is spelled wrong (teh). Excellent and very interesting chapter.
In this chapter, the evolution of stars is discussed. And it is
discusses quite thouroughly. The pictures helped to show the different
processes that stars undergo. The section on black holes was also
informative, but mabye some philosophical debate could be warranted
here. The use of bold terms was effective for glossery words.
3)Stellar Evolution
This paper is both informative and well written. Many topics
are presented, thoroughly and understandably. The writing style is
interesting, although there are a few grammatical slips. The only
problem with this paper is that it lacks direction. The authors seem to
use heavy element formation as something of a unifying theme. However
to truly tie the text together the theme of heavy element production
must be expanded.
Grade-4
4) Stellar evolution:
However unimportant, opening this page seemed rather bland.
Despite its explanation, I still had trouble understanding the purpose
of the H-R diagram and had even more trouble reading it. The "Stages of
Life" section was detailed in its information and explanation yet, I
still did not see an interesting image. Improvement began in the
section on Red Giants which effectively married image and text. My
interest continued until I came to the confusing H-R diagram again and
could not ascertain its purpose. However, once again, the page picked
up as the story of black hole was told wonderfully with image and text.
SCORE- 2
Stellar Evolution: The Life and Death of our Luminous Neighbors
Presentation: Made good use of overheads and figures used within the
paper itself. I found the presentation to be very interesting, because
the subject material was intriguing, especially the portion about the
black holes.
Paper Content: Great organization, made good use of headings and
subheadings to made it easier for the reader. I liked the fact that you
put the important key words in bold face.
Figures: Wonderful use of figures, they will catch peoples attention,
also they helped illustrate important points for example, the figure
camparing the size of the red giant to the size of our sun.
Score: 3
Sellar Evolution.
While critiquing Mark Williams and Arthur Holland's project I found
myself unusually captivated by the text. This very eloauently stlyed
text was only supported by the well placement of theri various visual
imagery. These graphs and photograph's only aided thier project and my
subsequent understanding of their text. They were placed in a succinct
manner optimizing their project's effectiveness. Therefore, due to the
unmistakable enjoyment I had reading their web site, my grade for Stellar
Evolution is a 5.
Paper 4: Stellar evolution
You had a good introduction. I was impressed with your extremely
high-powered vocabulary. This paper was very informative and was full of
highly technical descriptions. The pictures that you chose were
wonderful, with good tie-ins. However, you may want to shorten a paper
like this next time. It was, plainly, very wordy and was very difficult
for me to keep at attention. Obviously, though, great effort!
3pts
Stellar Evolution (Arthur and Mark)
You guys had a very informative homepage however there are some
minor corrections which I feel would be beneficial to your homepage. I
think you want to proofread it again because there are some spelling and
grammatical errors. When you guys were talking about the evolution of
stars it was such a long topic and the basis of your paper that you
should have divided the content further. I know you had italicized
subheadings for young stars, old stars, etc... but you really needed to
have bold headings for each of these ideas to make them stand out since
they were so critical. When you were talking about thermal equilibrium,
main sequence stars, and hydrostatic equilibrium I had to reread these
paragraphs because the ideas were hard to grasp. Maybe you could expand
on some of these concepts a little more. There was alot of complex
terminology in this homepage. The pictures were all very nice and
definitely helped make Stellar evolution easier to understand. You had
all the major points about Stellar evolution and discussed them
thoroughly. Overall it was a nice homepage. Grade: 3 points
4. Stellar Evolution
This paper does a good job in covering a large amount of
information. The subject is a little confusing, but the authors do a
good job in making the subject easier to understand. The numerous
pictures also enrich the paper. I felt the paper was also
well-written. I give this paper a three.
GROUP 3: Arthur Holland and Mark Williams
Now this is more like it. This chapter offers the perfect mix of
text, analyis, and pictures. It uses creative headings such as "Life in
the suburbs" when describing main sequence stars. One problem though:
The captions to some of the pictures and diagrams, including the H-R
diagram and the Red Giant picture, are fractured. Half of the caption
appears to the right of the picture, the other half below it. The Red
Giant process is explained beautifully. Arthur and Mark also do a good
job in analyzing the before and after effects of supernovas. RATING: 4
Stellar Evolution: The life and death of our luminous neighbors
-I liked the way you laid out your page. The way you broke the page down
into short concise paragraphs on specific sections made the topic easier
to grasp.
-My favorite part of your page was the entertaining paragraph and
sub-titles ("stars to big for their britches" and "Life in teh suberbs").
-There were allot of difficult glossary terms in this chapter but you did
a very good job of making their definitions accessible by boldfacing them.
-In the middle of your page the words which unbalance are combined to
form "whichunbalance" if this is a word you should bold face it and place
a definition in the glossary.
-Your use of diagrams was very good. Your diagrams helped clarify things
like tect or pictures could not have.
-The section on black holes was very long, but totally cool.
Chapter 4: Stellar Evolution: The Life and Death of Our Luminous Neighbors
Points: 3
A chapter very well done. The pictures were many and very
colorful and all had captions offering a bit of an explanation as to what
they represent. The charts livened things up nicely and were a pleasant
accompaniment to the text. The text, however, could have been dealt with
in a more sequential manner. The stages of a starUs life especially
could have possibly been done in a more understandable manner There is
a little bit of this same RchoppinessS that we see in the preceding
chapter. Also, a few typos lingered in the final web-version of the
chapter. Other than that, we see a nicely done chapter covering a lot of
information which, due to the good pictures and charts, artists
renditions, etc. does not bore us out of our minds. Aside from the very
few criticisms to be made about this chapter, the only remarks I have to
proffer are of praise. Well done!
Chapter 4 Grade 3
Chapter 4 had lot of good information about the evolutionof stars and the
stages that they go through. I really didnt understand the scale they
used but in was pretty interesting. I liked the amount of pictutres they
had in their chapter. The artist renditions were cool and the picture of
the neutron star was great.
5. Planets
Great set up in the intro. I loved the slide show. It was quite
interesting and very up to date. I appreciated the opportunity to view
the planets by themselves without the extensive text.
The body of the work was well written and informative. The presentation
left me stunned and the quality of the work was great. I was greatly
impressed with the effort this team put into their project. The text was
easy to read, but not too easy as to make me feel like I was being
treated like an imbisile.
The summary only went along with the great writing of the body and
wrapped up the chapter neatly.
EXTRAS: What is there to say but WOW, I'm not ashamed of my project as it
shows the experience and effort this team put into making their project
presentable to the eye.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 7
Our Sun's Planets-Anu Gupta and Amit Kalaria
Now, this is what I call a web page. This is the chapter that's going to
make our class famous. If only all of us were as hypertextually gifted
as Amit and Anu. Their chapter is not only plaesing to the eye but to
the mind as well. It is well organized and written in words that a
normal human being, like me, can understand. POINTS:5
Excellect backgroud. This caught my attention instantly as I
opened the web page. The links to the homepage were also very
valualable. It was especially useful to use the indexes so that I would
not have to look at the entire page if I did not want to. In terms of
the content this was one of the more interesting pages. I loved looking
at the slide show. This web sit was also interesting because it is
scientic yet not too scientific that a elementary student can not read
it. It really gives good insight into the planets. Some of the pictures
at th end were complex, however, it seemed to be a progression to that
point instead on initially being complex. Overall grade for this web page
2.8.
WOW! Your chapter is excellent. The images are great and well
presented. They are really incorporated into your chapter well. You
must know a lot about this stuff. Besides being presented well, your
chapter is informative and well written. It doesn't just look good. The
are not many suggestions I have except for the planet slide show. It
would help if you could put the name of the planet with its picture.
Otherwise, people who do not know much about this just see random planets
and don't know which one is which. Your chapter is great though.
Our Sun's Planets: The chapter is designed very nicely indicating that
the authors have previous experience in designing WWW pages. The
introduction is well written outlining the essential topics that will be
covered. Using indexes definitely helps the reader in moving from one
section of the paper to another. Pictures are well integrated into the
text, but lack captions. Statistical data is useful in emphasizing
critical points. The figures are well placed within the text although
when reading the text, there is little indication of what the figure is
showing. Even if these figures take away from the "beauty" of the page,
it is essential that they be included on the page. The authors do an
excellent job in elaborating on the similarities and differences between
the planets. Throughout the chapter the reader is successfully led "from
the solar system to its current status." Overall, the paper is well
written and the appearance of the page is phenomenal. (4)
Chapter 5. Great idea for slide show. Creative in making links to
different parts of paper. Obviously they put a lot of work into it.
Score=4
Chapter 5: Our Sun's Planets
You guys make me sick. :) Your web skills are truly impressive.
I loved checking out your page. The index setup was a nice touch. The
slide show however was almost too much. It took forever to load from
Angell Hall. It did have some nice gifs though. You did a very thorough
job on the topic I am impressed.
Score: 5
Chapter 5--Our Sun's Planets
I think that this was the best overall chapter. The presentation
is phenomenal. I really liked the slide show and background. The links
("next", "previous", etc) are a good idea, but they break up the text
too much. The images are good, as long as you have the time to sit and
wait for them to download. The descriptions are well-written and easy to
read, but it would have flowed more if the tables were in with the page and
not juts links. The final thoughts were very good. I give it a score of 5.
AMAZING!!!! I thought that this chapter was terrific! I wish that I knew
enough about computers to organize my chapter like this one. First off,
the background really added life to your chapter, and kept with the
subject of your chapter. I liked the introduction because it stated
exactly what was going to be in the chapter. The format of the chapter
was incredibly easy to follow. I liked the little graphics that went
along with each sections. I found the paragraph on the formation of the
inner planets very interesting. I was also surprised to learn that all
the terrestrial planets had once had water. I thought that water was a
feature unique to earth. I liked the way you inserted the figures into
the text bu allowing the reader to click on the figure if they wanted to
see it. That way, it doesn't disrupt the reading. One note, the
asteroid figure didn't work when I clicked on it. The part about
Jupiter's Red Spot was good because it is a feature that many people are
familiar with but don't know what causes it. Overall, this chapter was a
pleasure to read. (And even fun!)
This chapter examines the planets in our galaxy, and their evolution.
This chapter was reeeeaaalll smooth. You can definitely enhance this
project with a knowledge of how to do things with html programming. The
many aspects of the planets are dealt with, as are competing theories of
the planets' evolution. Everything was looked at real carefully. The
pictures, and that slide show, were real nice. About the only thing
missing, which is shown in the introduction, is a part about comets.
4)Our Sun's Planets
This is an interesting and original chapter. The authors score
points for creating a highly interactive text. The only problem in the
department of presentation are the long spaces at ends of pages.
Eliminating these would make for a very professional chapter. The text
itself is informative and has direction, but it is a little too simple.
This subject requires more depth. I don't deduct points for difficulty
of dive, but an easy topic needs more. The chapter needs a grammatical
revision- there are continuous tense problems.
Grade-3
5) Our Sun's planets:
Opening this page was quite a treat. Its organization was both
informative and fun. It was obvious that the authors of this page were
no strangers to the internet. My one gripe was that the text did not
read too contiguously because of the breaks. However, the information
it contained was in depth and, the images were well placed and
complimented the text perfectly. I even enjoyed the conclusion. It is
hard to make further comments on a page of such quality. SCORE- 5
Chapter 5 Our Suns Planets
This presentation is really eye catching. The link to the
pictures of planets is a very nice touch so that their immediate
presentation is not bogged down with too many photos. The technical
viewing side of the presentation is absolution stunning. The only change
I would make would occur in the pictures of the planets. I would let the
image remain on the screen instead of immediately jumping to the next
planet. The content of this project is extensive and well researched.
The pictures and tables correspond perfectly with the technical sections
of the text. This project wins best of show grade=5+
Our Suns Planets
Presentation: The presentation made good use of overheads...color stands
out in my memory the best...
Paper Content: I liked your space in our class space, however, one thing
I did not care for was all the links...I found at times it was difficult
to follow, because the figures were not included within the text.
Despite my own difficulty to follow at points, I can tell you put a lot
of time and effort into it...but go easy on the links.
Figures: I liked the fact that many figure were used, but I did not like
the fact the figure were not included within the text.
Score: 4
Our Sun's Planets
At first glance, one must realize the great efforts which Anu Gupta and
Amit Kalaria went through to make their web site as enjoyable for the
reader as possible. The indexs they incorperated into the project made
for easy acceess to any portion of the text you would wish to visit.
This wonderful and impressive portion of their site was undoubtedly made
possible by their great knowledge of computers. They had the proper
accompanyment of pictures along with the text which allowed for a great
experience with their web site.
Another notablequality of thier web site was the fact that one could,
ifso desired to, click on their references in the world wide web and that
reference page was subsequently implanted on the screen. Due to the
emmense enjoyment I recieve by reading their web site, my only conclusion
would be to give the a well deserved 5.
Paper 5: Planets
This, I remember, had a great use of internet technology to
showcase your project. ALso a great use of visuals throughout the entire
paper. You had very clear explainations. A very good comparison of the
inner to the outer planets, and furthermore a very good analogy of Venus
to the Earth!
Your use of apostrophes is a bit weak, and the paper itself is a
bit long... but the quality of the descriptions and the pictures were
enough to keep me quite interested. And not to mention your placing of
the USS Starship Enterprise was quite a smart addition. Good paper!
3pts
5. Our Sun's Planets
This paper is well done. I was quite impressed with the overall
presentation of the paper. The paper also gave me a good basic
understanding of the sun, planets, and moons. I feel the authors do a
good job in covering the information. I give this paper a three.
GROUP 4: Anu Gupta and Amit Kalaria
I will go on record as saying that of all the chapters in the
cybertext (including Spheres of Influence), "Our Sun's Planets" is hands
down the most creative, graphic, and enjoyable chapter. In other words,
it's the best. I honestly couldn't find anything wrong with it. The
background is incredible, the slide show is impressive, the pictures are
majestic, the text is thorough, and there aren't even any little problems
like typos. RATING: 5
Final Frontier: The sun and its planets
-Totally cool computer tricks.
-Very good use of pictures and some links. Some of the links were
unnecessary. With that many links and breaks it was some times confusing
to remember were you were and were you had and had not been. The text in
not so long that you need to be able to skip to other sections.
-The sections on orbits and paths was particularly interesting.
-I really liked you explination for the differences between inner and
outer planets.
-Your page was well broken up into specific sections but it would be nice
if you could eliminate the large blanks at the beginnig of each section.
-Cool stare trek ship.
-You made a very good connection between Earth, Venus and the danger of
greenhouse gasses.
-Your glossary list was very comlete but it would have been nice if you
would have highlighted the terms in the text.
-I particularly liked your "Final Thoughts" they were very poignant.
-Reading your page makes me happy our pages are not graded on a curve.
Chapter 5: Our SunUs Planets
Points: 1
This chapter is the hallmark of what computers can do in a
multi-media setting. The web-like approach to this chapter is ingenious
to say the least. The slide show of our solar systemUs planets exhibits
some beautiful shots of the Earth and her neighbors. This is really an
interesting concept. The charts, as before, serve only as an addition to
the raw data of the chapter. In this chapter, we see the same
belittlement of the title by a picture. Aside from the fact that it has
been relegated to the right side of the page, it is otherwise set up in a
relatively simple manner with the title easily identifiable as the
title. The major criticism of this chapter lies also in my biggest
praise of it. While the web-type access and the ability to jump around
in it is pretty neat, it can pose a problem as far as the readability of
the material. Having to click from screen to screen got to be rather
confusing after a while and, I have to admit, I actually got lost in this
chapter! As the chapter odes not have a straightforward beginning to end
format, I was not sure where I was in the chapter. I could not tell if I
was near the beginning or the end. I think I took a wrong turn at the
charts or something. I am not sure how I would change this chapter, but
I am not so sure that for such a limited amount of information, this is
the best way to present it.
Chapter 5 grade 4
This chapter was very good. It was set up in a good way because we could
veiw the pictures when we wanted to see them. I liked the background and
the text was great because it was very easy to follow and understand. I
think this is one of the best chapters I have seen. They obviously spent
some time on it.
6. Time
The intro was informative as to what the text will present, but I found
the prose very difficult to read... I began to feel I was reading a
graduate student's thesis on the theory of relativity.
I found the body of the text to be presented in a boring monotonous style
that left me eager to move on to the next chapter. I was constantly
asking why did this happen, how did this change occur, but to find my
question unanswered. The blocky text, void of even spacing or
indentation to break up the square like presentation made me sleepy.
The conclusion did a better job at presenting the arguments and keeping
my attention through the difficult prose.
EXTRAS: needs more photos to spice up a boring monotonous text
POINT ALLOTMENT: a very generous 2
Time-Roger Cohen and Robb Zerner
It's too bad that such a poor excuse for a chapter had to follow such an
amazing example. It seems to me that they got all of the information in,
but it was hard to tell. I was so bored by it that I couldn't stand to
read beyond IV. This isn't a web page; it's a plagiarized outline of
some sort. No one in their righy mind would waste their TIME reading
this chapter. POINTS:1
your chapter is very well organized which makes it esy to
follow. However, you need more pictures. It is so much text it gets a
little boring. You only have two pictures and of those two only one is
really relevant to the information presented. You should look for more
pictures to break up the text but also try and illustarte your points.
Some just for fun are okay but you want them to be relevant. You
certainly do cover the topic in depth and provide the reader with a good
understanding.
This paper was interesting to read since it did not list just
"facts". Time is a really interesting subject since its so theoretical.
A few problems were: The introduction doesn't make sense. You say that
time can be considered in the physical sense (the age of the universe) and in
the philisophical sense. You go on to say that "to this end (regarding
the philisophical aspect) we will shed light on the age of the universe.
Isn't that the physical aspect? Also, when talking about Space, time and
relativety, it would be more interesting to comment on how Einstein's
theory says that for an object traveling the speed of light, time will
stop (since time is you topic).
More pictures should be added to the page. It looks bland with
no background or pictures and just text. Another factor to be considered
is that you never showed up for your oral presentation. Thus, the
combined effects lead me to give you an overall score of 1.
Back to the future: The paper is laid out nicely and easy to comprehend.
There is a decent amount of scientific data used to prove assumptions
within the text. More pictures should have been added to separate long
periods of text within the chapter. The conclusion is very effective and
poses challenges to us current day humans. The glossary is helpful and
necessary. Overall, the many subdivisions assist the reader in locating
desired information. The title is probably the most creative out of any
of the chapters and the text is interesting and not too boring. (2)
Chapter 6
Good outline, format. Good use of scientific data, needs more pix.
Score=3
Chapter 6: Time
A nice discussion of the topic. I realize that time doesn't lend
itself to many cool graphics, but I thought your page needed something to
break up the text a bit. On my browser, your text looked very nice with
color added for contrast, however on an older version of netscape the
color was lost and so was much of the effect. A few gifs would solve
this problem. Overall a pretty good page.
Score: 2
Chapter 6--Back to the Future
The introduction seems a bit too elementary, it should be
broadened a lot more. Overall, the chapter was well-written and
informative. Image-wise, however, it was really lacking (but, then again,
there probably are not too many images that can be found for this
topic). I like how each topic has its own little introduction. The
presentation needs work, it is too dull. I give it a score of 2.
First off, I thought that the conclusion to this chapter was excellent
because it linked the work of ancient minds and present day minds. It
was an especially appropriate ending to this chapter. Overall, this
chapter dealt with a hard to grasp concept in an easy way. The
organization of this chapter was excellent because I knew exactly what I
was reading about from the subheadings. I thought it
was interesting the way that religion and geology related in the first
subheading, good way to tie them together. Also, I thought that the
section on radiometric dating was excellent. This chapter was important
because it started to link together some of the previous
chapters with the discussion of the age of the universe. I think that
more graphics would have made this chapter stronger instead of just
plain text. Overall, this chapter obviosly required a lot of research
and the authors obviously understood the topic. This was not an wasy
topic to explain! Good Job.
This chapter's topic is time. Various ideas about what time is, and how
it is measured are looked at. I also liked the philosophical discussion,
and the relationship with the church. But, this page could look much
better. Much more space should be used for pictures, tables, and
graphs. They really help convey your message better.
6) Back to the future:
Although the images on this page were minimal, their absence did
not effect my judgment of the work. The discussion of the evolution of
the separation of science form religion was interesting. The authors
went on to explain the difficult aspects of radioactive dating in very
clear terms. In addition, they aptly hit on subjects which had already
been discussed and did so in concise fashion. I enjoyed the information
this page had to offer but, my one complaint was that there just was not
enough there. SCORE- 3
Chapter 6 Time
I realize that the subject of time is not one which can warrant
many photos, but I would have liked to see more pictures for this project
to make it more visually appealing. I would have liked it if the major
terms were bolded to point out to the reader if they really were
important or if they were only secondary. I was confused on the topics
of cyclical and vectoral time and I wanted a better explantion of these
terms and their relation to themselves and Time as a whole. The general
relativity photo is a nice touch, but it only seems like an introductory
picture, rather than one which could help my understanding of the topic.
I think they could have added a section on wormholes in the black hole
section. They are related to time and black holes. The Kaufmann book
has some diagrams and explanations of this that they should look into.
Grade = 2
Chapter 6-Back to the Future:
Pictures, pictures, pictures, where are they? Throughout the entire page
there were very few pictures (only two actually) and this did not make
the web page very attractive. This paper, in my opinion, was too
scientific. Although it was very well written and thought provoking, it
just was not interesting. Another positive attribute on the other hand
was the use of the outline format. This technique allows the reader an
opportunity to skip sections if they desire. Overall, this web page
grade is a 2.2
Back to the Future: An Inquiry of the History and the Nature of Time
Presentation: I actually dont remember the presentation, but the
impression I was left with was I felt both of you were effective speakers
and seemed very knowable in regards to the topic.
Paper Content: Needs more subheadings or to be broken up a bit, because
I dont believe the audience in which is going to be viewing our classes
space will actually stop to read, because plain text usually will not
catch someones attention.
Figures: I was very disappointed to see that not a lot of figures were
used. Although, it probably was indeed very difficult to find figures
for this topic, but a lot of creativity or room to work with I do believe
was present
Score: 2
History and Time.
The sixth in the series of web site projects was the one provided to us
by Roger Cohen and Robb Zerner. Their topic was that of history and
time. While the text was imformative, and easy to read, one begins to
wander becasue of the lack of visual stimulus. This project's perameters
included that of visual accuity and cosmetic design. This was
undoubtedly a key factor for much of what keeps the readers interest is
this visual stimulus. The lack of visual stimulus in the document
diminished the overall status of what was a rather eloquently written
paper. However, coupled with the fact that there were no reference list,
one is forced to grade the project as a 2.
Back to the Future (Roger and Robb)
Your homepage was very informative but there are certain areas I
feel you can make better. The introduction really needs to be expanded!
I had no idea what I was reading about till I got to part 2 of your
paper. The opening line is very blunt and I feel needs to be changed.
You need content in your introduction. You do a nice job of thoroughly
explaining the many theories behind the age of the universe and Earth.
Organization was easy to follow. I think with some of these theories you
could have used some visual pictures for reader to see. There were not
many pictures overall in your homepage and I feel they can help guide a
reader along. When you talked about the Big Bang or The Red Shift maybe
you can put pictures here and other areas. When you talk about
Radiometric dating of the EarthUs age maybe you might want to make an
outline of all the individual steps. These are just some ideas. I also
noticed you have NO reference page, that could also be helpful if someone
is confused and wants to know who your sources are. Overall it was a
pretty good homepage. Grade: 2 points
6. Back to the Future
I think this paper is very well-written. The subject is
confusing, but the authors do a good job in presenting the subject so it
is easier to understand. But, there are still some areas of the paper
that are complicated to follow. I give this paper a three.
GROUP 5: Roger Cohen and Robb Zerner
To begin with, I have a problem with the overall format of the
chapter. It's setup like a rough draft outline, not an actual chapter of
a book. Another problem: There are only 2 diagrams in the entire
chapter, and neither of them relate to the main topics of the text.
While the text is well written, there is simply not enough of it. In
addition to adding diagrams, the chapter itself needs to be longer. This
is clearly one of the two or three shortest chapters in the cybertext.
RATING: 2
Back to the Future: An inquiry of the history and nature of time.
-Your page had very good organization. Your use of five seperate
sections made it easier to understand the specific topic.
-Despite the use of distinct sections you did a good job making those
sections flow together in a single work.
-A few more pictures especially near the beginning would have been nice.
I do not know if there are any available but graphs may have helped
clarify some technical points.
-I really liked your use of green to highlight the headings.
Chapter 6: Back to the Future: An Inquiry of the History and Nature of Time
Points: 2
This chapter presents a veritable plethora of information in a
very understandable and well organized way. The title font is smaller
than subheading and by-line fonts. If you havenUt already guessed, that
really irks me. Regardless, the information flows very well from
subsection to subsection which makes for a good chapter. The chapter is
set up in a very strict expanded outline form. It is very easy to
follow, but thereUs one thing missing. There are only two pictures in
this chapter and they donUt do much for adding to the text of the chapter
or complimenting the information of the text in any other way, other than
the fact that they are pretty cool pictures. DonUt get me wrong, these
pictures are very colorful, and I guess there is not much to take a
picture of, given the subject-matter: History and Time. However, we
donUt know where they got such cool pictures. As a matter of fact, we
donUt know where they got any of their information! There are no
Web-sites or works cited. CanUt they go to jail for that?!?
Chaper 6 grade 2
Though this chapter had some great information about the age of the
universe, radioactive decay and the red shift, it obviously suffered from
a lack of visual material. They seemed to know what they were talking
about but I really think they needed more pictures
7. Differentiation
The intro did a good job in keeping my interest. The title was humorous
considering the subject matter.
The body was informative, but not exceptionally exciting..however, it did
hold my interest. The sections were divided well and very clearly. I
was disappointed and frankly lost by the order of the division. I felt
the body could have been presented more effectively had the gas layer
been first (especially since the atmosphere formation is the first part
of the body) then the hydrosphere and then the solid.
The conclusion was informative and interesting.
EXTRAS: loved the photos, especially the globes of the solid and
hydrosphere. Very informative and eye catching. The charts, however,
were very difficult to make out and should have been ommitted or typed in.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 2
Spheres of Influence: Earth's Differentiation Into Solid, Liquid and Gas
Layers- Neil Sitron and Dan Goldstein
Like the title. Neil and Dan made good use of data tables, and did an
excellent job of explaining everything, though they could have made their
writing a little more interesting. The computer-gernerated Earth images
were really cool, and added to the page. POINTS:3
Your chapter is very good. You did a good job of tying in the
material to pertinance to us in our lives. You also used your images
well to explain your topic and give the reader a better idea about what
you were talking about. The tables seem a bit tedious but they do have
valuable information so I reccommend leaving them in anyway. It is a very
well done chapter.
Excellent paper. Very informative. You mentioned all the key
points and there was nothing that left me "hanging". The content was
fine and I cannot make any negative comments on this. But in regards to
the Web Page, I would not list the sources of the pictures next to the
scans, rather, just add it in the bibliography (or make a link). Also,
you refer the reader to table 4, but you don't have a table 4 in your paper.
The incorporation of the pictures was very nice (especially the
beginning). I truly enjoyed this chapter. Overall score: 4
Spheres of Influence: The page opens up with an attractive map of the
earth which leads readers to believe that more of the same is coming.
The introduction is well written and inviting. The tables are integrated
into the paper and by citing the tables within the text, there is a
greater chance that they will be read. Transitions within the text aid
in presenting varying hypotheses. Including formulas in the paper is a
good idea, one that has not been used by other groups. Also, the small
size of paragraphs hold the reader attentive. The paper is written at a
level at which it is easily understood and the scientific words are
explained well in the extensive glossary. The conclusion is crucial to
the paper in that it includes current scientific research however, it
lacks personal point of view. (3)
Chapter 7
Good coverage of the Earth's layers. Nice pix. More links to other sites
could make this better.
Score=3
Chapter 7: The Earth's Layers
A pretty cool page. The paper itself was well written and of
good detail. I liked the gifs you used in your paper, except that I
believe that the oceans are considered a part of the hydrosphere. (??)
Otherwise your page looks good. Your tables are a little fuzzy and hard
to read. You may want to consider adding links to some of the sites you
got your gifs from.
Score: 3
Excellent opening graphics, they draw the reader into the chapter. The
tables, although hard to read, support the information discussed in the
chapter. I liked the was that you started with the history of the layers
to give the reader some background information before you dove into the
topic. The explanation of the hydrologic cycle was especially good, and
also the explanation of the greenhouse effect and why we should be
concerned. One glitch I noticed: the text said refer to table three and
it was not in the proper place, and I never saw table four. Besides
these few things, I didn't catch any other mistakes. Well researched,
and good job making the topic interesting.
This chapter examines the physical make-up of the planet Earth. It
really covers quite a bit of ground, and the research has been carefully
done too. The graphs and tables are usefull in comparing the planets, or
showing rainfall over time. The pictures chosen for this chapter are also
really nice. They also are really colorfull.
5)Spheres of Influence
This is an excellent chapter. First, the text is informative.
The authors sufficiently explore and explain the process of
differentiation. Furthermore, the text is well organized and well
written. It is easy to follow from one section to the next, and the
grammar is good. Finally, the chapter is well presented. The color
background is a nice touch, and the pictures and tables add to the
text.
Grade-4
7) Spheres of influence:
The first thing which struck me about this page was that I felt
its tables were probably important but, unfortunately, they were quite
illegible. Aside from this problem, the rest of the images and
organization were perfect. The page was filled to the brim with
pertinent information concerning the Earth's layers. There was so much
knowledge available on the page that I would be tempted to describe it
as thick. That is a compliment.
SCORE- 4
Chapter 7 The Earth9s Layers
The initial viewing of this project is great, especially the
picture of the earth. The blue background also grabs the reader at the
start. The tables and graphs were nice, but they made reference to
certain tables in the text before the pictures were reached, causing the
reader to pan down to look at the refered table and then pan up to
continue reading. The content was excellent in the fact that it was well
researched and comprehensive. I really liked how they explained the
Photochemical Dissociation Hypothesis for each step of the reactions.
This allowed me to conceptualize the technical chemistry much easier than
if I had to decifer the reactions alone. Grade = 4
Chapter 7-Spheres of Influence:
Great introduction. Inparticular, the information allows the reader to
understand exactly what they will be reading later in the web page. In
lookig at the format I found the charts to be an added plus to the web
page. Finally, in looking at the glossary of terms I believe that the
words need to be highlighted throughout the text so that the reader knows
that they can refer to this term in the glossary. Overall, this web page
grade is a 2.8
Spheres of Influence: The earths Differentiation into Solids, Liquids
and Gas layers.
Paper Content: Good organization, but I felt that more subheadings could
have been used to break up the portion about the History of the Earths
Layers, but the heading placing for the rest of the paper I felt was
sufficient
Figures: Made excellent use of figures to illustrate points, but also in
my opinion they will catch peoples eye that are scanning our class space.
Score: 2.5
Spheres of Influence.
The seventh web site project is that of "spheres of inflence". Written
by Neil Sitron and Dan Goldstien in an effort to collaborate the varing
spheres of the Earth's environment. The page contained a very well laid
visual accuity to it along with a very interesting and imformative text.
However, with graphs such as table B, i was unable to locate a reference
in the text as to why it was placed there. Graph placement it far more
important than its counterpart photographs, because if not explaind one
only wonders why it was placed there. Overall, the project was
entertaining as well intellectually stimulating, earning a grade of 4.
Paper 7: Solids, liquids, Gasses
This paper is chock-full of good explainations that are presented
in a not overly complicated way. You had clear explanations of
hypotheses about atmospheric evolution. The descriptions of the
hydrosphere were quite extensive. Also, it seemed like there was a graph
or chart for every new idea presented. I thought this was a very nice
paper. 3pts
Earth's Differentiation Into Solid, Liquid, and Gas (Neil and Dan)
You guys had an excellent homepage. The content and visual
pictures were very good. I especially like the tables but I think you
might want to make them larger they were difficult to read. I felt that
the organization of the homepage was nice how with the solid, liquid, and
gas phases on the Earth you had a really good descriptive picture. You
guys were very thorough on explaining all of your ideas on each of the
individual layers of the Earth. There were not too many grammatical
errors that I noticed. Some extra ideas to make your homepage better is
maybe within the solid, liquid, and gas phases you can have some more
subtitles dividing up your various hypothesis and ideas. Another idea is
maybe a Table of Contents at the beginning of your homepage. The
introduction seemed to be very brief and I feel maybe you can go more
into what you plan on talking about in the introduction so readers know
exactly what to expect in your homepage. Overall I felt your homepage
was excellent! Grade: 3.5 points
7. Spheres of influence
This paper gives good descriptions of the subject at hand. It
also shows the importance in the different matter forms. I feel this
paper gets the assigned task done efficiently. I give this paper a three.
Spheres of Influence: The earth's differentiation into solid, liquid, and
gas layers
-Very pleasant background color.
-Your use of tables was very good. The tables were very helpful but in
some the writing was so small it made it difficult to read.
-Very good page layout. The dividers between sections made the topics
very easy to isolate.
-The pictures you chose were especially pleasing to the eye but they were
also very appropriate and educational.
-You were able to make one of the more boring topics very interesting.
Chapter 7: Spheres of Influence: The EarthUs Differentiation Into Solid,
Liquid, and Gas Layers
Points: 4
This chapter starts off well and stays that way right up until
the end (at which point, they summarily forgot to tell us where they got
their pictures from). You know, IUm beginning to feel like Siskel or
Ebert (God forbid!). At any rate, there are no problems with the title
or subheadings here. This is an easily organizable chapter organized in
an understandably very well. The material flows very well. There are
some very good pictures that accompany the text. In the section on the
crust, a picture showing land masses. In the section on the liquid
innards of the Earth, a very good picture of those innards. In the
section.... The charts are well-placed, relevant, and serve to help, by
example, in our understanding of the material presented. This is another
good chapter about which I have very few comments of a critical nature.
chapter 7 grade 3
This chapter was preety good and the pictures were great, but the text
was hard to read because of the background. The way they seperated the
chapter into three distinct categories, liquid, solid an gas was a good
idea. But the tables in the beginning were almost impossible to read.
8. Layers
The intro was presented well with the every day examples that enabled me
to relate better to the topic.
The body was interesting and informative, though the presentation may be
me affective if the crust and plate boundry explanations were closer
together as a tie in (ie, the plate boundries are responsible for crust
formation, and this is the different crusts that form).
The conclusion was week, it reminded me of the intro more of a revamped
introduction.
EXTRAS: good mix of photos and text, though maybe the photos should come
more in the middle of the text instead of at the end of each
section...easier to follow an argument if I can look at a chart at the
same time.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 3
I liked the table of contents, however, it wasn't really necessary. The
chapter in itself was well-organized, but the headlines and writing could
have been more interesting. The charts and pictures were relevant to the
text. Overall, I'd say this was a pretty good page. POINTS:3
Your pictures a very good. This is especially so beacuse they
really help to explain your points. They are not there just for looking
good but to further help the reader understand the material and they do
just that. The conclusion seems a bit blahh though. There must be
another reason to learn about the earth's layers than just an
appreciation for the topography. This is a good point but how maybe you
could talk about how this understanding has helped us in the field of
science as opposed to just learning about it for appreciation.
Nice paper. The material was straightforward and clear. The
outline (even though it doesn't follow the guidelines for what should be
in the Web Page) provides a good background for what is upcoming. The
pictures used were properly placed and referred to. Perhaps making some
of the pictures smaller would be better since it would fit in the screen.
Also, the handout we got in class about where the different fault line
types are present (our quiz) would be a cool picture to have when talking
about faults. Also, which type of fault is present the most on Earth?
Overall, the page looks nice and has good content. Instead of
just giving information about the divergent, convergent and transform faults
seperatly, it would have been nice to get a compare/contrast between them.
How does the stability, and strength compare?
Overall score: 3
Planet Earth: The chapter outline, unused by other chapters, helps the
reader locate specific topics. The introduction succeeds in its purpose
by relating to the reader "why he should care" in that it provides common
examples such as downhill skiing that most readers can relate to. The
chapter is well laid out in numerous subdivisions each pertaining to the
general topic. Figures are well distributed within the paper, separating
continuous scientific text. The summarizing text and figure are helpful
in reiterating what was previously stated. The closing thoughts are
concise but lack personal feeling. (3)
Chapter 8
Good idea of outline. A lot o work was put into this. Great job. ery
comprehensive.
Score=3
Chapter 8: Beyond the Surface
I like the idea of the chapter outline. I was disappointed that
you couldn't link straight to a topic though. If you can figure out how
to do it (I don't even know myself) it might be a nice touch. Your
graphics did a good job of adding to the story. But the last two
concerning faults were rather difficult to see. Your paper itself is a
good one. You detail the topic rather well.
Score: 3
Chapter 8--Planet Earth
The outline is a very good idea, as this is a good organizational
tool for the reader. Also, I liked the introduction. The images would
look better if they were downsized a little, but I liked the descriptions
that went along with each. The section on the mesosphere seems too short
compared to the others. The description of the plate boundaries was the
best part of the paper, well-written and descriptive. The glossary seems
too crunched together. I give it a score of 4.
The stucture of the Earth's surface, and atmosphere is examined in this
chapter. With great detail, this chapter explains the different levels
of atmosphere, the types of techtonic variation, and the plate
boundries. There are several informative tables and pictures used to
display the research. The outline at the beginning was a nice idea
6)Probing Beyond the Surface
This paper excels in organization. The outline at the beginning
of the chapter
makes it easier to read and understand the text. Ample material is
covered- from the composition of the Earth to tectonics. Illustrations
add to the text which is even well proofread.
Grade-4
8) Planet Earth:
I am not sure if the outline for this page is necessary since
each section is well organized. In addition, the information on the
layers of the Earth was scarce. I did find the section on the plate
boundaries to be adequately informative but, I did not need the graphs
which added little to my understanding of the subject. The summary
seemed somewhat redundant but served as a good wrap-up. Overall, the
page failed to keep my attention through its organization or
information. SCORE- 2
Chapter 8 The Earth9s Outer Layers and Plate Boundaries
I thought that the outline presented at the beginning of the
project allowed me to think about what I was getting into, like most
published textbooks. (a nice touch) The figures presented in this report
not only looked good, but were essential to the reader9s understanding of
the text. The explanations of the figures really helped me understand
their meaning and purpose for the overall report. I thought that the
explanation of divergent plates was good, but I needed a more thorough
definition of the new seismic-reflection technology to understand the
concept. The important words should have been bolded so I could look to
the glossary for their information. Other than this it was a solid
report Grade = 4
Chapter 8-Planet Earth:
To begin, the use of the introdutory outline was a great technique to
allow the reader to choose exactly what they want to read. The content
of this web page was also very interesting, inparticular, the section of
the page about the types of crusts. This section was interesting because
although it was brief it had a complex amount of information. Overall,
this web page grade is a 2.7
The eighth web site project which I was to critique was provided by Rebecca
Hotz and Kristen Schmidt. Their aim was to explore the influences Which
guide and mold our Earth into the life giving machine that it currently
is. The textual evidence they provide is very enlightening, of which
I esspecially enjoyed the section entitled "why you should care".
Although, I did not understand why they had, in the summary, included a
graph and attempted to explain plate techtonics once again, when they
already had so efficiently. the fact that the entire left side of the
page was left blank, hurt emmensely. Therefore I must grade them
accordingly with a 3
Paper 8: Composition of the Earth/Plate techtonics
I liked the good organization skills and the highly specific
outline. This way you provided the reader with a fun and easy experience
at the helm of the PC!! I was impressed with your good description of
the plate techtonics, the lithosphere, and the accompanying data... You
had an excellent summation of divergent, convergent, and transform plate
boundaries. This paper was not too wordy, and very to the point. A very
good use of pictures, also! A very good paper!
3pts
Probing Beyond the Surface (Rebecca and Kristen)
You guys had a really informative homepage. I liked how you laid
out the chapter with a table of contents. The introduction was very cute
with how you describe events humans do to the formations on the surface
of the Earth. Nice examples. You had some very nice colorful pictures
which made it easier to visualize what you were talking about, especially
with the types of earthquakes since you describe them so well it is
easier to visualize with the pictures. I did not see that many
grammatical errors in your homepage. Some areas which could use a little
touching up on is with the three layers of the earth. The mesosphere
and asthenospere I feel you could have added a little more to these
topics. Do they know what types of materials are located in these two
spheres because I know you guys mention it in the lithosphere. I just
think that overall the three spheres of the Earth section could have been
expanded. However, the rest of your content in the homepage was very
informative and thorough. Overall you guys did a great job! Grade: 3 points
8. Planet Earth
The authors present a large amount of information, but I wonder
if they could have made the paper more interesting. Parts of the paper
were quite boring. The paper does accomplish the purpose of informing
the reader about the composition of the earth and how the earth works. I
give this paper a three.
GROUP 6: Rebecca Holtz and Kristen Schmidt
I have a personal vendetta against this group: They used the
same atlas picture at the beginning of their chapter as the incredible
group that wrote "Spheres of Influence". I noticed that one of Rebecca
and Kristen's headings is titled "Why you should care". I am not sure
exactly which chapter, but I am definitely sure that in one of the 5
previous chapters I saw this exact same heading. The question is, who
originally came up with it? I do like the fact that this heading, as
well as the rest of the others within the text are written in bold. I
love the picture of the Earth's interior. It flows nicely with that
portion of the text. Overall, this is an excellent chapter. It flows
smoothly, it provides detailed analysis, and it presents informative
diagrams. The outline at the beginning is a nice addition. RATING: 4
Planet Earth: Probing beyond the surface
-The introduction was very thought provoking. I especially loved your
reference to downhill skiing.
-Your page layout and orginization was very good, it made the page flow
in a logical sequence.
-You had a great use of pictures and diagrams they were invaluable to
understanding your topic. I would have liked to have seen a cool volcano
exploding.
-I would have liked to have seen your glossary terms highlighted in the
text.
-Cool blue and yellow headings, GO Blue.
Chapter 8: Planet Earth: Probing Beyond the Surface
Points: 5
In my opinion, this chapter deserves the most points. The
chapter outline at the beginning of the chapter is very clever as well as
helpful. The outline is presented and the chapter adheres to this
outline very well. The only problem I have with this idea is that it
might be a little bit too much. It does serve a logical purpose, but for
chapters so small, it is a little involved for a brief chapter overview.
Still a good idea, though. This chapter has lots of excellent pictures
that show us the types of plate tectonics, cross-sections of crust, the
plates of the earth. etc. The picturesU places of origin are cited as
captions under the pictures themselves. Neat. Also, at the end of the
chapter, stands a brief section on additional and suggested reading.
This is good, good stuff. The only criticism I can muster, and itUs been
heard over and over, is that the damn picture of the Earth comes before
the title of the chapter!
chapter 8 grade 3
I liked this chapter because I had to do the same kind of research for my
chapter and they did a good juob about presenting. They covered the
different plate boundaries very well and the parts about the different
layers of earth was good. This paper also had some good pictures that I
probably would have for my home page if I had found them.
9. Magnetism
The introduction was hilarious. I enjoyed each and every step. The Dick
Clark bit was funny. The beginning reminded me of the "Twilight Zone"
and I expected Rod Sterling to jump out at any time.
The body was also presented well, the reading was easy but still though
provoking while the mixture of fact and humor kept me interested the
total time. The only downer of the text was the constant referrals took
away from the continuity of the reading..would be better placed at the
end of the text.
The conclusion was another humurous wrap up of the entire topic.
EXTRAS: the humor was great, though more photos would be nice
POINT ALLOTMENT: 5
This page was really cool. It was well written with good pictures, great
headlines, and to top it all off, a video. Cool! There was only one
problem; in-text citations. Once again, these facts could have been
paraphrased to become virtually undetectable by the plagiarism police.
They're really annoying and unnecessary, and they subtract from the
quality of the page. POINTS:3
I really like the beginning of your chapter. It really grabs the
attention of the reader, to say the least. it is very creative and well
written long with the rest of the text. However, you seem to use a lot
of quotes. I think it would be better if you put mopre things in your
own words and took out a lot of the quuotes. Some do provide good
insight but there are just too many. it seems like you are just taking
stuff from lots of other people instead of presenting it yourself. You
could also use more images.
This was a fun paper to read because David presented the material
in a manner which was interesting. Instead of just pouring out
information, the material was conveyed in a subtle manner. A little more
detail about the effects of the Earths magnetism would have been good.
How far away from the Earth does one still get the effect of the magnetic
field? I also remember learning that the south pole of the Earth is
really the north pole of a magnet (or something like that). David needs
to talk more about these types of details since it is central to the
Earths magnetic field (I think the beginning of his chapter refers to
the opposite pole thing, but its not too clear).
A "personal Thoughts" section would be nice. What do you think
would be the effect of no magnetic field on Earth? What would happen?
Also, how can a .6 Gauss (the strongest magnetic field on Earth) have so
much effect when a child's magnet has a stronger magnetic field?
A few more pictures would be nice, but considering you did this
with no partner, it's an excellent job. Overall score: 3
The Earth's Magnetism: The introduction is amusing yet educational.
Including a video in the chapter is a creative idea; however, it cannot
make up for the lack of figures and short text. References are not
necessary within the text. The comical humor within the text is a nice
change from what the other chapters offer. Using scientific data is a
suitable way to prove stated propositions within the text. The number of
direct quotes taken from various sources is informative, but not always
necessary. More subdivisions could be used within the text to assist
readers in locating essential information. Overall, the paper is well
written, entertaining at some points, but lacks in the amount of
substance that the other chapters contain. (2)
Chapter 9. GOod paper. Short, but expected since it was only one person.
Needs to change colors of glossary terms to make it stand out more. Take
out the quotes and paraphrase. More pictures are needed.
Score=2
Chapter 9: The Earth's magnetism
Your writing style is definitely unique, but I liked the
narrative form you used. It was as if you were taking me along on a
journey to discover the topic. I did however find some of the writing a
bit confusing. You leave the reader dangling for more info which he/she
may or may not get later on in the paper. Overall, thought it was nice.
You may want to change the text color on your glossary terms (hard to
read), also your first link doesn't work.
Score: 2
Chapter 9--The Earth's Magnetism
I had a problem with the images, they would not download. I don't
know if this is a problem with the page or just my computer. A better
description would sound more educated. I thought that "Webster's
dictionary defines..." was juvenile. The presentation could use a bit
more work and the chapter seems shorter that the others (but, I do
understand, as it was just a one person group) The content is good and
very informational but is written too informally. I give it a score of 2.
This chapter was excellent! It was very reader friendly and the style in
which it was written was fun to read. The text of the chapter was
appropriate and did not get too technical. One suggestion: part two got
a bit long and I think that it would be helpful to divide it into
different subheadings. Also, the figures could use captions. One topic
that might be interesting to discuss would be the effect of the poles
switching on us like they have before. What kind of consequences would
that bring about? Also, I liked the part about what the magnetic field
looks like, it helps the reader visualize what you are talking about.
Overall, I found this chapter interesting and easy to follow. Great job.
This chapter deals with the Earth's magnetism, the magnetic fields which
engulf our earth. There is great detail into the poles, and their
relation to the Earth. Also, the physical make-up of the magnetic fields
was very informative. More pictures, and the use of graphs and tables
could improve this chapter. The magnetic bodies metaphor at the
introduction was a nice idea.
7)Earth's Magnetism
This chapter is well written and engaging. The essentiaal
information is presented. However, the heavy reliance on quotes
obscures the explanation of several difficult concepts. A more direct
style might make things easier to understand at key points.
Furthermore, some more exploration of this topic could be useful. There
are few illustrations, but this is understandable-it's hard to
illustrate magnetism.
Grade-2
9) The Earth's magnetism:
The introduction to this page was clever and humorous which made
me want to read further. As I continued to scroll, the information was
transmitted in an orderly fashion. The conversational tone was pleasant
but, my only problem was that the page seemed somewhat short. In
addition, I thought that some of the technical details may have been
oversimplified such as referring to the Earth's composition as "stuff".
There
was also a lack of images which I understand may have been difficult to
find on the topic. SCORE- 3
Chapter 9 Magnetism
I thought that the overall explanation of this subject did not
get overly technical, making it more enjoyable to read. The pictures
needed some kind of explanation or caption to explain their purpose. He
talks about how rocks become more magnetic when they turn from liquid to
solid, and I would like to know how with a more detailed description.
When he mentions that the earth9s magnetic field looks like a comet or
teardrop from space a diagram is necessary because these two images
represent two different images in the mind. I thought that the topic
could have been researched more extensively. Grade = 2
Chapter 9-The Earth's Magnetism
To begin, the use if the webster dictionary definition on this web page
adds a more personal touch to this page. It also does not make the
reader believe that the information to follow will be too scientific to
enjoy. This web page has a vast amount of information, howeve, I believe
that the title headings need to be alot larger then they are. Finally,
the special thanks at the end added a nice touch to the enitre page.
Overall, the grade for this web page is 2.6
The Earths Magnetism
Presentation: I enjoyed your presentation, because I liked the humor you
brought to the topic. To many people the Earths magnetism is not a major
concern or an attention drawing topic, however I though you kept the
audiences attention by using humor and a bit of bitter satire. I also
felt that you were very informative and made a very complex topic easier
to understand.
Paper Content: Needs more headings or breaks within the paper. Again I
liked the use of humor within the paper, for example, Is it love? Is it
fate? Is it density? No, Its Magnetism. Again a very creative way to
spice up what one might consider a dull topic.
Figures: I felt that more figures could have been used. I do realize
that this was probably a difficult topic to find information on through
the internet, but I would suggest scanning picture in for the updated
version.
Score: 3
Earth's Magnatism
The ninth project was provided to us via the mind of David Fiedrich,
which was a detailed inventory of how and why our Earth has the magnatism
it does. David depicts what is going on in the
magnetosphere, and described how it was formed and the advantages of
having such a characteristic. However, (minus the little televison
camera, placed at the forefront of the project which no one could get to
work) there was a lack of visual stimulus. I became lost in all of the
scientific jargon which filled the project and I was consequenlty bored.
Hence, I must grade him with a 2.
Paper 9: Magnetism
A very cute use of language is a good technique that you utilized
to identify with your audience. An excellent use of incorporating
quotations throughout the paper. This was not a very long paper, but
informative nonetheless.
2pts
The Earth's Magnetism (David)
You definitely had the most humorous homepage I have read yet.
You have a good way of describing magnetism and keeping the readers eyes
glued to your homepage. Even though your homepage lacked pictures which
I think you need to add I found myself still interested in what you were
going to say next. I pretty much understood magnetism at the end of your
paper which I guess was the goal. You have a creative writing style! I
did not notice too many grammatical errors in your homepage. You also
had some really good quotes and I especially liked your thanks column.
However, I think to make your chapter better you need more pictures so
readers can visualize magnetism better and a descriptive table of
contents. I could not get your slide picture to work at the beginning
but it was definitely a nice touch to your paper. Overall you had a
creative homepage and I really enjoyed reading it. Even though it lacked
in certain areas it was well put and interesting. Grade: 3 points
9.The Earth's Magnetism
While reading this paper I actually got very annoyed with it,
especially because of all the quotes the author used. I would have
enjoyed the paper more if the author paraphrased the quotes, and put the
paper in the words of the author not in the words of other authors. The
author did cover the information, but I just did not enjoy the paper. I
give this paper a two.
GROUP 8: David Fiedrich
I like the last sentence in David's introduction: "Is it love?
Is it fate? Is it destiny? No, it's magnetism." Like some of the
previous chapters, this chapter is badly in need of a few more diagrams.
Magnetism is not the easiest subject to picture in my head. The text
itself is well written and shows that David possesses thorough knowledge
of the subject. There are, however, too many quotes. Some of these
quotes should be re-stated by David into his own words to make the
chapter seem more original. The glossary definition of Dick Clark is
humorous, to say the least. RATING: 2
The Earth's Magnetism
-I loved that you had a vidio. Unfortunately for some reason I could not
see it.
-You had a great intro; it was the best out of everyone. Idid not get
the Dick CLark comment he has great talent and is a true artist.
-I do not think you had to site your sources so often it made the text a
little garbledd.
-How come everyone could do those page deviders except me?
-Your text was very entertaining and informative but a few more photos or
diagrams would have been nice.
-The color of your glossary terms was to light it make them very hard to
read.
-I really liked your "thanks" section it was very appropriate. I think
it is Juan Veldez who grows the coffee.
-I was very impressed with your page. This is especially true when I
think that you did it all by your-self.
chapter 9 grade 1.5
This was a well organized paper that attempted to explain a really
complicated subject. I wish I had a sound driver on this computer So I
could have heard what he put in his chapter. While the chapter well
organized the lack of pictures was kind of disappointing.
10. Violent
The intro was a bit long winded. The first sentence alone took over one
half of the introduction space.
The body was very informative and presented in manner. The natural
events in our history was blended in well to allow the reader a sense of
the magnitude and power these events have. The only drawback was the
representation of these events was one sided in that it only discussed
the negative effects they have.
I feel the conclusion could have been wrapped up better with more real
life examples that effect the reader.
EXTRAS: great photos. plenty of interesting views of the power of the
destructive forces at work
POINT ALLOTMENT: 3
Another "good" page. The pictures were cool, and it was written like the
science book I had in junior high (which is positive). But, I used to
thing that a page could never have enough pictures. This one had a few
too many, which made loading tedious. It's not like we haven't seen
footage from earthquakes before. POINTS:3
Your chatpter ius very good. You especially did a good job with
the images. Not only in selecting them but the captions are good too.
they help to understand the image and also the material. You may want to
add more statistics. The conclusion comes into mind here where you talk
about natural hazards being much less numerous than manmade ones. This
is a great point but it would be much more effective if you had numbers
to go along with it.
Nice page! The overall style and content was good. But the
amount of detail covered for volcano's was poor compared to that of
earthquakes. For example, when does a volcano explode? Can we predict
these (and how)? Also, a picture (like the one you had during your
presentation) of the three types of volcano's would have been nice and
made it easy to understand the differences.
By looking at the pictures that you have, we realize the damage
and severity of the hazards. But in your conclusion you say that more
deaths occur due to manmade effects. Then why are Hazards such a big
concern to humans? Perhaps mentioning the economic consequeces of
natural hazards and how much the government spends on damages, would
re-enforce why hazards are so damaging (socially and economically).
The pictures are very nice and abundant. Good job overall.
Final score: 3
The Violent Earth: The introduction text and beautiful pictures beckon the
reader to read more and more into the text. The separating of
subdivisions into questions is a useful technique. Examples such as the
ones used on Pompeii Mount Vesuvius and Krakatoa always help to relate
data in theory to real life occurrences. The agricultural and technological
uses for volcanos could have been elaborated on a bit more. When
writing a caption for a figure, it is sometimes helpful to find a way to
make the caption stand out, either by setting it off to the side or by
decreasing its font size. The figures and photos are very relevant to
the text and include attractive photographs rather than just boring charts
and scientific designs. Sometimes it is difficult for the reader to read
sizable paragraphs such as the ones on seismic waves and earthquake
classification. Although these are very informative, a suggestion would
be to separate the text in multiple paragraphs. The description and
usage of the Richter scale is well reported. Overall, the paper is
enlightening and the major advantages are the examples of the volcanoes
and the earthquakes that have affected each one of us. (4)
Chapter 10: Natural Hazards
You have some very cool graphics here. You may want to move the
Mt. St. Helens pictures to your site (unless they are too big?) since
they took a long time to load from the other site. Your text was clear
and informative although it may be written a too easy a level. It
depends on whether the audience is college students with no science
background or something higher or lower in scale. Also your links at the
end don't work (I think you have the link going to your file space before
looking for the outside site. You need to go straight to the site w/o
accessing your space) Overall though, this is a pretty good page.
Score: 3
Chapter 10--The Violent Earth
The introduction is good, it gets right to the point of what they
are going to talk about. The images were great. Again, as in most
chapters, they should be shrunken. The description of volcanoes is very
good--well-written and informative. The flood image looks better with
the description and border (than it would have without it). the
earthquake section is well done. The glossary is just way too long,
though. I give it a score of 3.
Wow! Excellent graphics in this chapter. If these pictures alone don't
make this chapter interesting, I don't know what would! The introduction
was good because it stated exactly what would be covered in the chapter.
I really liked the subheadings and the way that they asked a question, I
thought that it was really creative. Good examples of previous natural
disasters, they help the reader understand the importance of these
occurances. Two mistakes I caught: in the subheading "What uses do
volcanoes have?" the word scientists needs to be plural. Also, the words
"it can" in the section on floods needs to be divided. The
paragraph on seismic waves needs to be divided because it got long.
Overall, this chapter was excellent and provided plenty of graphics to
illustrate the concepts the chapter discussed. One graphic that I
thought was interesting in the presentation that you didn't include in
the page was the diagram on the different kind of volcanoes. Just a
thought. Great job overall!
Natural disasters is the topic for this chapter. Several different types
of disasters are examined. The historical information on volcanoes was
particularly useful. It was also interesting to read about the seismic
waves, and the effects of the earthquakes. The pictures used in this
chapter were really nice, and colorfull. The graphs and charts increase
comprehension of the topics too.
8)Violent Earth
This paper is competently written and reasonably informative.
Good explanation of earthquakes and volcanoes. The comprehensive
glossary adds to the text. However, a greater exploration of scientific
phenomena could replace some of the historical and economic information.
There are some good illustrations, but several reflect economic or
historical information and don't seem absolutely necessary.
Grade-2
10) The violent Earth:
The opening images of Mt. Helenes were great but, why were they
discolored? Aside from that, the other images and organization were
excellent. However, I felt that the page dealt too much with the
results of natural disasters rather than their geologic causes. the
exception was the section on earthquakes which blended cause and effect
quite well. I also felt that the conclusion was somewhat half-hearted.
SCORE- 2
Chapter 10 The Violent Earth
The first images were good, but when I saw that I could see
larger versions of all of them, they were really fantastic. I liked the
fact that this group mentions how dangerous these natural hazards are to
humans. With only technical jargon, one cannot really visualize their
power. I thought the combination of both real photos and illustrated
diagrams was great. I got to see the effect of the earthquake as well as
the logistics behind it. The fact that they mentioned the economic
effects of these disasters really shows how these occurences can not only
hurt you physically, but also monetarily. This project was well
researched and well presented. Grade = 5
Chapter 10-The Violent Earth
Great! This was the first reponse I had to this web page after I
completed reading it. I loved the actual pictures used as oppse to drawn
pictures. I found this web page to be interestinh also because of the
topic and the ways the authors addressed the subject. Finally, this web
page is interesting because it answers many questions that the reader
would ask the writer, but can not. Overall the grade for this web page
is 2.9
The violent Earth
Paper Content: Good organization and use of headings to break up the
paper. The paper was interesting, because it used a lot of real life
examples when discussing the earth natural hazards.
Figures: Excellent figures that are going to draw an audiences who are
browsing our class space.
Score: 3.5
Natuarl Hazards.
The tenth and final web site page was created by Tina Chow and Sean
Dooly; attempting to explain the Natuaral Hazards pervading our living
Earth. This page was extremely attractive and ver imformative as well.
The ability of the reader to enlage the volcanoes upon clicking on the
volcanoe icon was ecspecially usefull and enjoyable. While the rest of
the page was just as phenomenal. The picture were breath taking and
placed exceptionally in the text. The page was imformative and easy to
read. The text almost jumps out at you making it fun to learn more and
more about he subject. They well deserve a 5.
Paper 10: Natural Hazards
You had a very well-organized outline! The diagram of the
volcano was very good, and an excellent graphic of the hurricane!
Overall the nice pictures are a wonderful refinement to your interesting
project. I liked how you tied in practical histories from the damage
that earthquakes provided in recent history. This definitely brings the
message home. This was a great paper, colorful and not too wordy. A
very interesting topic, well covered!
4pts
The Violent Earth (Tina and Sean)
You guys had an excellent homepage which was VERY informative
with all of our natural disasters. I really like the choice of pictures
you guys used and the amount of pictures you used. I like how you gave
examples of volcanic eruptions, storms, earthquakes, and floods that have
actually occurred and even had pictures to show how bad some of these
natural disasters really are. Grammatically and the content of your
paper was really good. There are a few things you can add to your
homepage. I would put in a table of contents at the beginning. Your
conclusion also needs to be expanded. There probably are more manmade
disasters but how about supporting that with some evidence to compare
natural hazards and manmade hazards in your conclusion. You had a very
thorough glossary! The organization of the paper was very nicely done
how within each topic you had subheadings. Overall, I really enjoyed
your homepage. Grade: 3 points
10. The Violent Earth
This paper does a good job explaining the subject, and the cotent
is easy to understand. My interest was held throughout the paper. There
were also many inciteful and interesting diagrams. It is apparent to me
that the authors put a large amount of time into the paper. I give this
paper a four.
GROUP 9: Tina Chow and Sean Dooley
This chapter is written about my favorite of all the chapter
topics assigned. To begin with, I like the "Heat Drives the Volcano
Machine" picture. Tina and Sean list several good examples regarding the
dangers of voclanoes. I was thinking, perhaps, that it wouldn't hurt to
write a little more information regarding the uses of volcanoes. Group 9
does an excellent job explaining seismic waves, especially in
distinguishing the traits of P-waves from S-waves. Problem: Under the
section about effects of earthquakes, the 2nd and 3rd pictures are right
on top of each other. The glossary is quite long. RATING: 3
The Violent Earth
-very good attention getting introduction.
-Your pictures and diagrams were great. The best out of any of the pages.
-You had so many glossary terms it would have been helpful if they would
have been highlighted in the text.
-I was unable to get your extra pictures at the end of the page up on my
screen.
-This topic and page wa so good it was exciting.
Chapter 10: The Violent Earth
Points: 4
Now, at last! Here is a chapter whose intro picture and
subsequent title work in almost perfect editorial harmony to my eye. The
picture is there; not too large, not too small. It does precede the
title, however it does not upstage the title or belittle the importance
of the title. The title is centered nicely and is in a nice big font.
And I dig that little picture of the Earth! This paper is organized
well, the clickable blow-up pictures are neat (their also referenced),
and I like the heading/subheadings. The section on what uses volcanoes
have is very interesting. One thing I noticed though, was that some of
the pictures were not centered leaving large spaces of blank text. This
may be a problem with the software, I donUt know.
11. Climate
Informative Intro, let me know what to expect from the text.
Great start to the presentation of the text, letting the reader know why
they should care about the topic. The text keeps me interested as I read
because it informs me how I'm affected at each step. I felt the text
explained difficult theories in a concise and easy to read manner that
didn't leave me wondering what the text was about.
The presentation of how the reader is affected continues with the
conclusion and is a great way to wrap up the text.
EXTRAS: Might have gone chart crazy ..many of the photos were great..but
the enormous amount of charts and photos took away from the text.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 3
It Was Hot. It was Cold. It was Climate.- Chad Muszynski and Kia Berry
Yet another example of one extreme to another. There could have been
more pictures here. The charts were cool and pretty self-explanatory,
but pictures would have really added to the page. The information was
well-organized, yet boring, and the writing was mediocre. POINTS:2
I really like your title, it is very creative and catchy.
However, once you move from the title to the introduction something is
lost. Yuo should work on the iintroduction becasue it is very boring and
loses the readers interest. The rest of the paper is very good. the
conclusion is well done too, maybe you could lok to the conclusion to get
some stuff for the introduction.
Nice paper. In the introduction however, you should take out the
note saying "found in the web version only". Someone reading the page
will not know what you're talking about.
The content of the paper is fine, but the appearance on the Web
is rather dry. There is barely any color and the subtopics should be
bolded or colored ("The Green Grassland and "The Temperate Climate" for
example). Also, refer to the charts and pictures more. You never
mention if there is any corellation between the fact that the surface
temps of less industrialized countries is lower than that of modern
countries. Does this have any effect with the Greenhouse effect?
Also, you mention that the Greenhouse effect will be mentioned in another
chapter (thus you give a general overview), but I would think that your
chapter should be the one which covers it in the most depth (since the
greenhouse problem affects our climate so much).
The reading style was nice and "invitive to read". the
Introduction gave a good feel for what would be presented later on.
Overall, the paper was good, but the lack of "fluff" reduces the
effectiveness of the paper. Overall score: 3
Climate: The introduction is thought out and prepares the reader for all
of the topics to be covered. Rather than just describing what each type
of climate is, the authors successfully convey how each particular
climate affects us which is even more important. The paragraphs are
short and concise, not allowing the reader's interest to stray. The
utilization of statistical data is a fine technique in providing evidence
of previously stated facts. One improvement could be made by spreading
out the figures within the text. More subdivisions could have been used
to help the reader locate needed information. The "A Few Final Words..."
section is very good in that it relates scientific jargon to our daily
lifestyle. The concluding section as in many papers is many times the
most important part of the paper in that it explains where we can go from
here. (2)
Chapter 11
Good use of links at bottom. Needs a bit more color pictures. Good use of
subtitles.
Score=3
Chapter 11--It is hot, It is cold, It is climate
There is not much of an introduction, it is too dispersed and
general. The different climates (tropical rainy, Great Grassland) should
be elaborated upon more. As they are, they do not seem to say very much
in the way of information. I liked the Final Words. The links are a
good idea. Overall, it was well-written, but it puts too much emphasis
on climatic change and not enough on climates as a whole. Very good
images. I give it a score of 2.
This chapter was easily read and understood. I thought that the part on
climate and development was especially interesting, I would have liked to
read more on that topic. Also, I think that it would have been
interesting if you would have written more on what actually causes the
different climates, is it distance from the sun, tilt of the earth, etc.
It might be a good idea to include pictures of the different climates
that you discussed, and would help the reader visualize them. One
mistake: in the subheading "What is Climate" you put the words it affects
together. Good explanation of the Greenhouse effect, and why it is
relevent to climate. Overall, good job.
Climate is the focus for this chapter. It is interesting to see the
socio-political impact climate has on the world. The section on the
development of the seasons in also quite informative. The greenhouse gas
section is particularly important; we need to be informed on what is
really going on with our atmosphere. The graphs and tables are well-used
in this chapter.
9)It Is Hot, It Is Cold, It Is Climate
This paper begins with a sociological study of the effects of
climate. Later the paper shifts to the scientific study of climate.
The scientific section needs expansion. Perhaps a clearer organization
(more subsections) would help the text. The writing is good save for a
few grammar problems. Good use of illustrations.
Grade-2
11) It is climate:
This page was certainly heavy on facts which made it one of the
most informative pages in our class. Also, its images went along very
well with the text. The main problem I saw was that the organization
and division between topics was somewhat skewed and led to some
confusion. However, I did appreciate the conclusion and the chance to
jump to other links which pertained to the topic. SCORE- 3
Chapter 11 Climate
The overall presentation of this project (the photos, and
especially the links at the end) was pleasing. There were some sections
of text which seemed to be a bit bulky, but it did not effect the reading
of the project too much. I thought that the organization of this
presentation was very good. They explained climate, the different types,
and how they can effect people right from the start. The technical
aspects came later, unlike many projects, and this kept me interested
throughout without a yawn. I liked the mention of climate effecting
human lives both directly (extreme heat or cold) and indirectly
(agriculture and growing seasons). Their were a few pictures which did
not seem necessary but otherwise this was a good presentation. Grade = 4
It Is Hot. It Is Cold. It Is Climate.
Paper Content: Great organization made good use of headings and
subheadings. In my opinion it will draw a lot of attention to
individuals browsing our class space, because most likely they will not
read your whole paper, but rather pick and choose topics of interest to
read about. You have made that very easy for you audience to do.
Figures: I felt that more figures could have been used, however, the
figures used were of good choice for example the figure explaining the
earths axis in approximately 11,000 years.
Score 3
The eleventh web site was introduced to us by Chad Muszynski and Kim
Beirg. Their web site was easy to read and very imformative. The only
drawbacks to their page was the fact that they had left out a reference
glossary, therefore one can easily be lost in the techinical jargon
pervading the page. Another drawback to the page was the fact that there
were few picture at the outset of the page. However these minor
infractions cannot take away from the wonderful text and subsequent
pictures. The other helpful aid that they added was that all of their
web sources were indexed. They deserve a 4
Paper 11: Climate
You included a good vivid description of several major climates.
There was complete coverage of all the aspects of climate dynamics. You
did a good job with the incorporation of information with interesting
charts and diagrams of the greenhouse effect. Your slant on discussing
the modern dilemmas that humanity faces was interesting and informative.
Overall, a very good paper!
3pts
It is Climate (Chad and Kia)
You guys had a very nice homepage which in some of it I could
actually relate to. I too believe climate really does shape a personUs
moods and the future and itUs nice to know that issues such as this are
noticed and being studied because they are crucial. I thought the
organization of your paper was very good with all your subtitles. Your
subtitles really went into what the paragraph was going to be about. I
like how you divided up the paper. I found a few grammatical errors here
and there but nothing major. You guys definitely have a good amount of
pictures but I just felt as I was reading that there were areas which
could have been nicer with a picture next to it. Climate effects our
daily lives and I think pictures keeping this in mind would have really
added to your homepage to show exactly how climate effects humans and
showing real life picture of humans interacting with the environment
(example farmers). You did a nice job in summarizing up all the ideas of
climate and really stuck to the subject. I really enjoyed reading your
homepage and felt it was very informative and is a critical subject which
people need to be informed of. Grade: 3 points
11. It Is Climate
This paper gives a good deal of information. the paper is also
easy to comprehend. Overall, this paper accomplishes the assignment. I
give this paper a three.
GROUP 10: Chad Muszynski and Kia Berry
I am not exactly keen on the title of "It is Hot. It is Cold.
It is Climate." Early on in the chapter, I found a sentence which is
somewhat awkward: "Climate is not merely the average weather events but
rather the sequence of weather events compose the climate." Under the
section "Coping With Climatic Change", when Chad and Kia refer to "figure
1", this figure should be located immediately below the sentence or
paragraph. Instead, I had to scroll down nearly a page before I saw a
figure of any kind. I still am not sure which was figure 1 because there
were two figures side by side and neither of them were labeled. The text
is fairly informative, but where is the glossary? RATING: 2
It is Hot It is Cold It is CLimate
-You had a good section on why climate is importent. This section got me
very interested in the rest of your page.
-I would have liked a few more highlighted or bold faced items. This
would have helped break up the long text a bit.
-Your diagrams and graphs were very good but a few more pictures would
have been nice.
-A glossary of terms would have been very helpful.
-Your "final words" were very importent and good.
-I loved the colors of your title. very appropriate.
Chapter 11: It Is Hot, It Is Cold, It Is Climate
Points: 2
Here we go again. The picture before the title thing. And also,
the title font is much smaller than the names of the authors. I donUt
mean to imply that they havenUt done a good job, itUs just that I donUt
think that who wrote it is more important than what the chapter is
about. At any rate, I like the intro and the definition of climate. As
in the last chapter, I like the good use of headings and subheadings.
There are some pretty neat pictures in this chapter. I like the Equator
Projection Pictures and the pictures detailing the obliquity of the Earth
are pretty interesting. Along with these pictures, charts are always
good for spicing up any paper on climate, and this is no exception. The
only problem with the pictures is that we donUt know where they got them
from. Regardless, I always think that a list of additional reading is a
boon.
chapter 11 grade 3
This chapter had a good blend of scientific knowledge about climates and
knowledge about different types of climates around the world and how they
impact upon people. I liked how each individual climate was explained,
but mayvbe the scientific stuff should have been put in front of it.
12. Resources
The intro puts it to the reader and shows the reader the importance of
the topic and text.
The body was not too difficult and presented in a flowing manner that did
not leave me bored or feeling the text was choppy. With the importance
of the message the author did not allow the amount of the text to
overwhelm the reader.
The conclusion was a great wrap up that challenged the reader to make a
difference.
EXTRAS: great photos and text font switching that prevented the text from
becoming monotonous
POINT ALLOTMENT: 3
Excellent paper. It was extremely fun to read since you clearly
state how the environment affects us. The page was very "earthy" and
"friendly" (good adjectives, huh?). The material covered was great and
it is good that you mentioned the pro's and con's of the alternative
energy sources. The beautiful pictures and constant reminder of how it
impacts the reader make this a really nice page.
The three charts which you have need to be incorporated into the
text a little better. There is no caption or reference telling the
reader what it is. Also, you should make it so that if you click on it,
the pictures becomes bigger (the writing is a little hard to read).
Overall though, I really liked the depth and material covered.
Good job. Final Score: 4
The Good Earth: The introduction is very well written, and unlike many
of the other chapters, it emphasizes the effect of daily human activities,
and poses rhetorical questions that are later answered in the text. The
chapter is written on a level that is easy to read and somewhat
entertaining. The many subdivisions and numerous photos add to this
well-balanced chapter. The size of the paragraphs help to ensure that
the readers' interest will not stray. The general theme throughout the
chapter is "What can we do?" This question is of utmost significance in
sustaining our planet in future years. When discussing each of the energy
sources, both advantages and disadvantages are listed comparing and
contrasting the uses of these sources. However, the one weakness
observable is the lack of a glossary. Overall, the paper is excellent
and by the time that the reader has completed the chapter, he is
motivated to "Reduce Reuse and Recycle!" (4)
Chapter 12
Great Title! Great pix! Great tables! Great paper! Great presentation too!
Realy informative. Gives good perspective on "How to Build a Habitable
Planet." by preserving our resources and keep it habitable!
Score=4
Chapter 12: Harvesting Earth's Resources
A fun site to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there. A fun
and creative web page. Your paper may be written in a way that is almost
too easy, but it doesn't bog the reader down in heavy details. I liked
your use of graphics and pictures to illustrate your points and show some
of the Earth's natural beauty. Your links at the bottom don't work, you
might try to fix them.
Score: 3
Chapter 12--The Good Earth
The chapter is written way too informally. It seems like a
television show and not an actual scientific work. The chapter uses a
lot of statistics and facts, which make it seem more believable, though.
It was well-written and gave a good description of the material. I like
the section of "Where do we go from here?" Great images! However, the
ending seems to preach to the reader, not teach. I give it a score of 2.
This chapter was excellent! It was written in a very personable style
that kept the reader interested. The introduction was great and an
example that nearly everybody could relate to. The paper was organized
well and i enjoyed the titles of the subheadings. Good job making them
interesting. I was amazed to learn that it takes nature one million
years to make the amont of oil that the U.S. uses in one year. Scary!
The pictures were good and added to the text without being distracting.
The second part of the paper about the alternative sources of energy was
very interesting. I think that it was important that you recognized the
fact that the world will not be able to use traditional sources of energy
forever, and the harm that they are inflicting on our fragile
environment. Good idea to propose and discuss other methods of energy.
I was very impressed by this chapter. It let the reader know that
something must be done about the amount and source of the energy that we
use, but it was not overbearing.
This chapter explains the energy sources that we humans use. The fossil
fuels are discusses, along with how they are extracted, exploited, and
how they will be gone, soon. It was interesting to see the various other
resources that we have to use on the earth, in place of the fossil fuels,
for energy. The pictures in this chapter were highly effective in
reinforcing the text. The tables and graphs also provided clear
explanations. It was also an interesting approach to use a more
informal, friendly text.
10)The Good Earth
This is a refreshing chapter. It thoroughly covers the subject
matter in a creative and humorous style. The chapter is well organized
with clear and concise subsections. Furthermore, this paper has
direction. All the subsections relate to one another. Good use of
illustrations, and nice proof reading. This was not a difficult dive,
but it was done with energy and creativity.
Grade-5
12) The good Earth:
The organization and presentation of this page really achieved
its goal. I was truly forced to consider the limitations on the Earth's
resources. It was clear in its definitions and utilized them to make
clear points. The images which the authors incorporated helped tell the
story of the Earth's depleting resources and were excellent. The
conversational tone was far form pedantic and did not come across as
overbearing dogma. The facts were clearly presented and the page left
the reader with the authors' personal perspective which was quite
thankfully labeled as such. Overall, a great webpage. SCORE- 5
Chapter 12 Harvesting the Earth9s Resources
This report was presented well in that there was a nice
combination of educational diagrams and photos to coincide with the
textual information. This presentation gave me a personal feeling
(unlike that of most text books) when reading it, especially throught the
crafty titles for each section. This report is honest with the reader.
Although they tell us that we should conserve energy, they also mention
that some of the methods are quite expensive (solar power). This was a
nice touch. I would have liked to seen a ratio of how much carbon
dioxide was being produce in association with oxygen being produced. Is
the level of oxygen dropping? How long do we have until it is too late?
Grade = 4
Chapter 11-The Good Earth:
Ahhhhhhh! This was a refreshing web page with the use of actual pictures
before the use of the more technical pictures. Beginning this web page
with a rhetorical question added an interesting twist in that it
immediately allows the reader to think about the subject at hand. This
web page is also valuable in that it tells practical information such as
the amount of water that covers the earth's surface. Overall, the grade
for this web page is 3.0
The Good Earth: Harvesting Earths Resources
Presentation: This was the most creative presentation that I have ever
seen, you kept my attention and the rest of the audiences attention
throughout the entire presentation. I would consider that to be a
remarkable accomplishment considering that most of the class dazed off,
slept, or did crossword puzzles throughout the rest of the
presentations.
Paper Content: Organization easy to follow, excellent and creative use of
headings...this chapter will surly catch many peoples attention who are
browsing our class space.
Figures: Again, wonderful use of creativity to draw and catch your
audiences attention
Score: 4
Harvesting Earth's Resources
The twelfth web page was provided to us by Michelle Menuck and Abby
Goldstien. Other than the first two graphs being unclear as to what
their purpose was, this page was very imformative and entertaining. A
wonderful addition to this page was the "personal perspective". I loved
the skyline pictures and the breath taking photographs of the forests.
However, along with unclear graphs and mispalced photographs i am forced
to give the group a 4.
Paper 12: Harvesting Earth's resources
I can remember your group as giving one of the most memorable
presentations in class! It was extremely creative, and you gave us great
personalities and interaction skills! Good use of quality diagrams and
excellent photographs. Great tie in with the energy solutions section!
This was very interesting to all, a great paper!
4pts
The Good Earth (Abby and Michele)
You guys had a very interesting and informative homepage. I
never realized how many natural resources I use every day and how
critical they are. Overall you guys had a creative writing style to your
paper and I thought your subtitles were good. I like how you supported
most of your natural resources with pictures that humans can actually
relate to on where these natural resources are being used and located. I
like how you guys tell the readers where we can change how we use natural
resources in order to help conserve them. The organization, content, and
style of the paper was very good. I did notice you guys however did not
have a glossary. I pretty much understood most of the terminology in
your paper but maybe for other readers a glossary might be nice. To make
your homepage more organized you guys might want to add a table of
contents at the beginning of the chapter. Overall I really enjoyed
reading your paper and it had many good ideas which most individuals
probably need to read about because natural resources is a serious issue.
Grade: 4 points
12. The Good Earth
This paper is extremely well-written. The authors present the
paper in a "friendly way" rather then just a scientific report. The
paper has good descriptions. The paper also covers a large amount of
information while keeping the reader's attention. I give this paper a four.
GROUP 11: Michele Menuck and Abby Goldstein
I question the usage of the second person "you" in this chapter.
Instead of saying "your daily routine" and "your morning coffee" why not
say "one's daily routine" and "one's morning coffee"? Just a thought.
Under the section "The Air That We Breathe" change the sentence from
"Intelligent, we may never know." to "Intelligence, we may never know."
What's up with the phrase "you guessed it" in describing the prescence of
oxygen due to photosynthesis? While this paper is not exactly stellar
gramatically, it does possess the key ingredients of a good chapter:
clear explanations, several diagrams, and a good conclusion. I like the
suggestions for alternative sources of energy. Again, where's the glossary?
RATING: 3
The Good Earth: Harvesting earth's resources
-Very good pictures and page layout. This made your page very easy and
quick to read, while at the same time getting all teh points across.
-YOu had very catchy and well highlighted headlines. The coloring of the
headings was very good also.
-Great "do something" and "personal perspective" sections and great
phrase at the end.
-This was perhaps the most importent page of them all. Every
highschooler should be required to look it up. You did an excellent job
in pointing out the dangers facing our earth using clear scientific facts
and theories rather than impassioned scare tactics. In the end this is
always more effective in convincing people to make a change.
Chapter 12: The Good Earth; Harvesting EarthUs Resources
Points: 3
IUll start at the end this time. WhereUs the glossary? There
are lots of good pictures in this chapter also which are captioned
neatly. The headings and subheading serve to organize the chapter very
well. Speaking of, the subheading titles are clever and I can appreciate
the humor, but they may be a little...trite(?) at times. I respect and
really like the plug for recycling, reducing, and reusing. The chapterUs
subject matter puts a damper on the readersU concept of the future of
mankind, but these plugs remind us that it is not too late. BUT, only if
we get up off of our keesters and do something about it. I like the
pictures of the rain forests, the city skyline, pictoral examples of our
natural resources, etc.
chapter 12 grade 3.5
This chapter was one of my favorites because it was so well organized
and the material was presented in such a straight forward that it made it
easy and fun to read. I liked the picture to but I thought the most
important thing about this chapter was at the end, when we told that we
should do something about the problems that we have.
13. Sustaining
I loved the photo at the introduction (looked like you Ben). The
presentation of the itroduction made me want to read the text
An interesting presentation of why the environment is the way it is and
how our views have changed over recent history. The Great details show
me how I will be affected
Good conclusion...while the body makes us feel bad for all the
destructive things we have done to the planet, the conclusion gives us
hope and shows that not everything we do is evil.
EXTRAS: to many photos , many too small to even read or interpret.
POINT ALLOTMENT: 2
Our Delicate Environment: Finding Ways To Sustain Civilazation- Joshua
Rosen and Michael Schmidt
The cut comic drew me in, the writing kept me interested, and the
conclusion left me begging for more. Excellent use of diagrams, an
abundance of information---a really great page. POINTS:4
I really like your first picture. It definately catches the
interest of the reader. The rest of the paper is very well done too.
The material is clearly explained and very thorough. the other images
are weel used and have good captions for explanation and incorporating
their maning into the text. you did a good job of discussing the
information in understandable terms yet not leaving anything out.
Good job. Some of the figures (Figs 3, 6, 7, 8) are way to small
to see. Why not make them a little bigger? The content of the paper is
good. You covered the main points and backed them up with good evidence.
You made a lot of good points throughout the paper. Although the
technology has led us to hurt the environment in certain cases, perhaps
we can use technology to clean us up. The quotes used were a good idea
since they support your comments by showing others agree. One thing
which was not clear was some of your personal examples. For example, you
mentioned under POLLUTION that the pollution of a smoke stack in Michigan
will cause acid rain in New England. How? The smoke stacks cannot be
spreading the pollutants that far (so why wouldn't the affects be local
rather than over great distances)?
Overall, this was a nice chapter and tied in well with the
previous few topics. A good conclusion was nice since it wrapped up all
the information from your chapter and even touched the previous one.
Overall score: 3
Chapter 13
Funny irst picture... Is that supposed to be you Ben?:)
Great photos! A lot of links. A lot of time was spent on this. Great
glossary.
Score=4
Chapter 13: Our delicate Environment
A ton of cool gifs. I really liked the layout of your page.
The paper needs to be a little more focused though. You covered a lot of
ground on this page, but only scratched the surface of each. You might
be better off cutting down on the scope of your paper and going more
in-depth. Still a very cool page.
Score: 3
Chapter 13--Our Delicate Environment
The opening picture is cute and the introduction is
well-written. Fantastic images throughout the chapter. It makes great
use of facts and statistics. Great presentation. Also, I like how they
explain how to take action on pollution, ozone depletion, etc. I like
the links section. I give it a score of 4.
This chapter was great! The introduction, along with the opening
graphic, interested me right from the beginning. The text in this
chapter was interesting because it included the effects of all the
environmental problems on human health. If this doesn't incite people to
take action, nothing will! Some of the pararaphs got lengthy and I think
it would be better to break them into subtitles. The graphics in this
chapter were excellent and really added to the text. Although the
chapter did discuss some possible solutions to some of the environmental
problems, I think that it wuld be good to suggest what people can do on
an individual level. If we want to make any progress in saving
the environment, the little things really do matter. This chapter was a
strong ending to the entire project and it addressed the most important
problems of our generation. Excellent job.
11)Our Delicate Enviornment
This section is well written and informative. It covers many
interesting topics and provides adequate information on each topic.
However, this paper lacks the organization of the previous chapter which
covers similar subject matter. Greater organization might allow for
more depth in certain areas. Good use of tables.
Grade-3
13) Our delicate environment:
This page seemed an apt wrap-up for our class project. Its
organization might have been a bit crowded but, its images and message
worked well together. I appreciated the chance to jump to another
website but was somewhat distracted by its placement in the middle of
the text. Overall, the abundant images and information all came
together well and, the conclusion was a great way to put the topic of
Earth's environment into perspective. SCORE- 3
Chapter 13 Our Delicate Environment
The first picture was nice in that it makes me want to read on
relieving me of any fears of technical jargon being thrown my way. I
wanted to see a better transition between topics. This presentation
seemed to be a number of individual reports, rather than topics trelated
under one common goal. I liked that they explained the diagrams in their
own words, being that some of the diagrams had lengthy complicated
explations connected to the pictures. The smaller diagrams which could
be enlarger were nice because they did not take over the report when they
were condensed. I would have liked a more detailed explantion of the
global thermometer and how it works. Grade = 3
Chapter 12-Our Delicate Environment:
Great introductory picture. It really makes the reader interested early
on in the web page. This picture alone also makes the page more
personal keeping the reader interested in the following suject. One
major problem I had with this web page, howeve, is the amount of
information that this web page has. I feel there was a need for an table
of content so that some of the information could be sorted through.
Finally, the use of the more personal picturses made this web page
unique. Overall the grade for this web page in a 3.0
Our delicate Environment: Finding ways to Sustain Civilization
Presentation: One question...are you a Political Science major? What
made me ask that is that you both were effective speakers. In addition
you made excellent use of overheads.
Paper Content: I liked the organization of the paper you made good use
or headings to make you paper simple and easy to follow for your
audience. Also, I liked the fact that you used larger font...that also
made reading earsier and less straining especially if you have to stare
at a computer screen for long periods of time...very considerate!
Figures: Good use of figures to illustrate important points for example
the figure explaining the cycle of how radioactive substances reach
people. I myself am a visual learner and a figure like this empathizes
an important point. In addition, helps explain a complex process.
Score: 3.5
Delicate Environment.
The final page was presented by Joshua Rosen and Micheal Schmidt,
concerning the delicate Earth. This page was certainly the page to
finish the class web site off with. The page was well designed, along
wit it being well written and imformational and interesting. The fact
that the text ws well aligned with the pictures in the page and the great
content of the text made for an enjoyable time looking through thir
site. The fact that one can click on the small graphs and icons and
enlarge them helped emensly. They desreve a 5.
Paper 13: Sustaining Civilization
Some fun and very colorful diagrams! This presentation was
extremely informative. However parts were too long and too wordy for the
average reader. I liked the pictures. It was obvious that you guys
spent a lot of time. This was a very info-packed project!
3pts
Our Delicate Environment (Joshua and Michael)
You guys not only had an interesting homepage but it was
extremely informative and I feel everyone needs to understand what is
killing us and our earth. You had a creative writing style, superb
pictures to back up all of your ideas, good organization, and a very
complete paper overall. This is a serious issue and you did a good job
in addressing all the topics harming the Earth. I especially like how
you could click on a small figure and get a full size picture, nice
effect! Your pictures were very informative especially the one of the
ozone and greenhouse gases. Your chapter was direct and to the point you
did not drift away from the issues at hand. I guess now all you guys can
add are little things such as a Table of Contents to make it even more
complete. You really talk in depth on all your major subjects the
greenhouse effect, ozone, pollution, and the natural hazards. Overall
it really was an EXCELLENT chapter in which I really could not find many
errors. Nice Job. Grade: 4 points
13.Our Delicate Environment
The paper covers a large amount of information, but the paper
seems like it is just facts thrown out at the reader. Therefore, it was
hard for me to stay interested in the paper. But, the paper did bring to
my attention some important concepts such as nuclear energy. I give this
paper a three.
GROUP 12: Josh Rosen and Michael Schmidt
The opening cartoon has a nice touch to it. Josh and Michael
present a very good analysis of the ozone layer. Perhaps, though, the
figures that have been scaled down and can be clicked on for larger size
should just be full size to begin with. I remember two figures that were
like this- figure 3 and figure 8. There may have been a couple others.
The diagrams on the precipitaion of abnormalities should be bigger. This
chapter makes a good transition from describing the ice cores in
Greenland and Antarctica to explaining their purposes for determining
changes in Earth's temperature by the year 2030. I find the diagram on
radon gas invading the home to be insightful. Overall, this is a very
solid chapter. RATING 4
Our Delicate Environment: Finding ways to sustain civilization
-Very good opening photo and introduction.
-I really liked the way you centered the topic heading.
-I don't think you had to bold face the entire text.
-Great "slowing Down Ozone Depletion" section-Your closing remarks were
very poignant.
-This was a very importent topic an dyou did a very good job of giving us
an unbiased view of our situation and options. None of our options are
perfect and none of our decisions are easy.
Chapter 13: Our Delicate Environment: Finding Ways to Sustain
Civilization
Points: 5
I have just had a change of heart. Remember my critique of
Chapter 8? I said that chapter deserved the most points. Sorry guys, IUm
going to have to rescind that statement. After reading and looking over
this chapter, I think that this chapter is superbly done. I love the
picture of the cartoon professor standing in front of the blackboard.
ThatUs pretty neat. There are figures and charts and pictures all over
this paper. They are all cited, they are clickable, and they are all
relevant! I now think that THIS chapter deserves the most points, and I
gave it the most. It is easy to see that the works from which all of the
information was drawn were carefully given their due. The ONLY problem I
have with this chapter, and this is a silly thing to write as a
criticism, is that it is a bit lengthy. Given, thereUs a lot of stuff to
say about the environment, but it got to be too much for me. Blame it on
ADD.
Chapter 13 grade 4
This was hands down the best chapter done this semester in class. Thye
obviuosly spent an enourmous amount of time researching the political,
social and scientific aspects of the ozone and pollution. Thye had some
extraordinary pictures to, but the amount of informatiom they had is
what blew me away.