Great Things About Being a Woman

· We got off the Titanic first.

· We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.

· Taxis stop for us.

· We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

· No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.

· We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.

· If we forget (or neglect) to shave, no one has to know.

· We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear.

· We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

· We have the ability to dress ourselves.

· We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

· If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we look like an idiot.

· There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

· We'll never regret piercing our ears.

· We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

· We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence, because they aren't listening anyway.

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