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Big Willie and the $1,000 pizza

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Big Willie and the $1,000 Pizza

This story is second-hand; unless the person who told it to me was lying his ass off, it is true, but I've filled in some details. If you know this story and would like to correct me or elaborate, please email me.

Big Willie was an icon on the Detroit and Midwestern pool scene for a few years in the late 1990s. He'd been pretty successful as a very young man, owning and operating several coin-operated machines in pool halls, arcades, and bars throughout Detroit. You couldn't miss Willie. He was well over 6 feet tall and somewhere north of 500 pounds. Not all fat people are jolly (I am quite grumpy, in fact), but Willie was an upbeat guy. He loved pool, and he played a pretty good game himself. But he recognized real talent, and was keen enough to know that he didn't have it. So he became a "stake horse" in his late teens, putting up cash for local hot shots to gamble against road players. This is one story of his travels.

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Willie takes two young Detroit players (Brandon and Jimmy) on a road trip. They are at a casino; Brandon and Jimmy are playing in a tournament. After their matches are finished for the day, they catch a ride to a local tavern to see if there is any pool action to be had after hours. This tavern has a special deal on a 24" pizza: Eat the whole thing, and it's free. Not interested in the free meal, they instead negotiate with the owner. "We've got a friend who can eat this whole pizza." The owner says, "No one has EVER eaten an entire pizza. You bring him in." "How much are you willing to bet?" Hesitant at first, but titillated at the prospect of doubling the night's earnings, the owner eventually pulls every last penny out of the cash register - a little over $1,000. "Bet it all," he says. "Go get your friend."

Excited at the prospect of an easy grand, Brandon and Jimmy catch a cab back to the casino. They find Willie in the restaurant. He is eating dinner. There are four plates in front of him.

"Willie, you gotta stop. We've got a match lined up for you. Eat an entire pizza - we win a thousand!"

Willie leans back in his booth, wipes his chin, and puts on his business face. "Give me the specs, boys."

Brandon and Jimmy relay everything they can recall. "24-inch round Chicago style pizza. Sauce, pepperoni, meatballs, and every veggie you can imagine. A 3/4" layer of melted mozzarella. Can you do it, Willie!?"

Willie picks up his fork and resumes eating. "Sure I can," he says. "Just let me finish my dinner first."

They go back to the tavern. A crowd has gathered. Willie meets the owner, verifies the bet, puts up the cash, and finds a seat. Shortly thereafter, the pizza comes out. Willie takes his time, bite after bite, and works the crowd. People want his autograph; children ask to have their picture taken with Big Willie. The tension mounts as he gets down to the last slice and looks a little green, but it's all for show. Willie has no doubt he can finish - he just wants to keep the fans on the edge of their seats. He finishes the pizza and wins the thousand, and the crowd roars. Willie beams with pride.

After the cheers and high-fives subside, Willie turns to the owner, who is deflated and stunned at his loss. Willie shakes the man's hand and says, "Wanna go double or nothin'?"

Willie passed away in 2007. He will be missed by family and many pool friends.